Black for Stability

A great smile spreads across my face. I feel so happy like I am on a mountain peak. I did it. I made it to the top and it feels so wonderful. I feel so alive and warm inside. I close my eyes and can feel the wind blowing through my hair and around every part of my body. The clouds surround me and provide a luxurious comfort. It feels like a dream, until I open my eyes again.

A tear runs down my cheek. The journey of life is forward moving and I must keeping going. I know this means back down the mountain I must go until I reach the next one. But, I don't want to go. I want to remain in this wonderland and enjoy it's beauty. More tears fall. I have no choice. It's time to move. Life has more to offer me. Slowly, with teardrops scattered along my path, I begin the journey to the next peak. Hopefully, the next peak plateaus for me and I will be able to enjoy it so much longer. The sun begins to dry my tears. I can see the next peak far off in the distance. I begin to pray for a peak that plateaus, but I have no illusions just hope and the wisdom to be understanding that I will feel love again.

I had a great afternoon yesterday. I spent time with a friend of mine who I am getting to know a little better. He showed me so many things...where he works, his co-workers, the scenery of the area. He also showed me a little more of him which I deeply appreciated. In return, I shared some of my thoughts and stories letting him get to know me on a more personal level. I really enjoyed learning about the things we saw together. I even enjoyed having the cold wind blow so hard and seeing the big waves crash before our eyes. I had a wonderful time.

After we said our good-byes and our see you in June remarks, I began my journey home. I immediately called my best friend, Kelley. "It's not fair. He is amazing. It is just Talif all over again." I can picture Kelley referencing the Talif story in her mind.

Talif...great guy...deeply touched Michelle's heart...gave her great inspiration...encouraged her to follow her own path...disappeared from her life after the lesson from him was learned...many tears shed.

"I can see it is happening again. It is another lesson. He is one of those. He teaches me something and moves out of my life." She tried to calm me. I told her about the lilacs he gave me. "Oh my" is all she could say. She knows they are a favorite of mine.

I told her about the rubber bracelets with a word stamped into them. I buy them at the gas station everytime I am in town. I bought a bunch and offered him one. He picked the black one that said stability. I chose the pink one that said hope. There you go...I thought to myself. Lessons stamped on a little rubber band. Kelley continued to be supportive knowing that I will get through this like before. "It may be a different lesson. He may not be one of those" said Kelley and spoken like a true best friend. I tried to find peace in her words. Although knowing the history of those, maybe he will be the one to change it. Maybe he won't disappear. I can not let the fear of what was take away any joy of what is or what will be. Maybe I just need hope as I watch him find his stability. I really don't know, but we will see.

BTW, I looked up plateau in the dictionary.....

Main Entry: 2
plateau
Function: intransitive verb
to reach a level, period, or condition of stability

Life is so ironic!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

RTK....I still remember the first time I saw you. You were coloring at the table. When it was over, I just wanted to stay and enjoy your company even more. You fascinate me and I like the uniqueness of you. Thank you again for the flowers, for lunch and everything. I felt like I got to know you better. Send me your address from the east coast and stay in contact. The first stained glass boat I make is your's. Until we laugh in June.....MLL