Da House MzAriez Built

Family Traditions

2010-10-25T23:32:00.003-04:00

I was taught growing up that family traditions were important. These rituals were part of the family dynamic and sacred glue that bounded us all together at certain times of the year. We did particular things, ate select foods and spent quality time as a collective. Everyone in the family knew these traditions and followed them accordingly. The only time a change in plan took place was at the discretion of the family matriarch, my grandmother.

Everyone knew where holidays were held. Grandma was not only the home base, but the director and the cook as well. Her kitchen schedule would dictate when people ate, carved the pumpkin, passed out the presents, searched for the eggs, twirled the sparklers, etc.... And happily, we all followed her lead.

It was never the same when she passed. The family traditions started to fade. The gatherings became infrequent. Her fabulous meals ceased to be. Those of us left behind were struggling to fill the void left by such a strong woman.

As a mother, I knew it was important to have traditions. It provides routine and scared glue for a family, especially with everyone scattered around the country. So, I held fast to the things Grandma taught me. I cooked the food, hid the eggs, bought the sparklers and pumpkins and made sure that every tradition was celebrated to the best of my ability. I am sure Grandma would be proud.

Also, I took it one step farther. I created new traditions within my own family. They include some of these.....

Friday is pizza night.
Playing games as a family is good.
We watch the Super Bowl and eat pizza & wings while critiquing the commercials.
We try to camp every summer.
Everyone gets a new ornament every Christmas.
The Macy's parade is a must on Thanksgiving morning and so is heading out into the cold on Black Friday.
We each have a creation story and our own theme song.
We take care of Santa and the reindeer every Christmas Eve with snacks.
We root for the Cleveland Browns.
We sing Michael Jackson songs.

And now a new one has been added....

We love roller coasters!

I grew up going to a local amusement park named Geauga Lake. I had great times there and anticipated returning year after year. Every chance to ride the Big Dipper made me happier and happier. I loved the roller coasters there, but my world was forever changed when I went to Cedar Point for the first time. It was there that I thought I had died and awoken in roller coaster heaven. And, as every year passed and Cedar Point kept building bigger and better, my loyalty grew. Many people tested me taking me to other parks and claiming their park was better, but they were wrong. No matter where I went and what I rode, I still preferred the park on the pennisula in Ohio.

This weekend, I passed down that love to my kids. I had been waiting for all the stars to align and the opportunity to appear. I knew in my heart that this would be the year. The Rugratz were big enough and brave enough finally. The free time was on the calendar and the funds were in the bank. It was definitely a go.

My son was hooked off the first ride, but my daughter had to warm up a little. After a day at Cedar Point, I knew they shared my love. It was evident halfway through the day when the talk turned to next year. It was decided. Next year, we are coming for a whole weekend.

I think it is wonderful that now as part of our family dynamic and sacred glue is the riding of roller coasters at Cedar Point every year. What a fabulous and fun tradition!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

2010-10-16T03:02:00.002-04:00

Today was the day. Although I didn't know it when I woke up, four hours later after a really nice business meeting, I knew. It was time to make the journey to the pumpkin patch.

I have been scouting local stores and markets for white pumpkins for the past two weeks. Much to my chagrin, all I found was your typical orange pumpkin. Now, I like pumpkins in any color, but I have found that the glow from the orange inside flowing out of a white pumpkin to be to my favorite. And the year we first put them out, everyone else liked them too.

A few days ago, I saw the white pumpkins at a local farm and made that mental note to go back with my son. With the last two years before he becomes an adult, I try to makes sure we practice the family traditions that he may one day pass down to his own. And picking, carving and cleaning pumpkins is definitely a tradition I believe my future grandchildren will appreciate.

At the farm, it was a quick beeline to the white patch. We did browse the extra-large $20 orange pumpkins, but it was right back over to the white ones. It didn't take long to pick our favorites since the quality standard we have is just three rules. #1. It must stand up straight. #2. It must have a clear front/face area. #3. It must have a stem. After purchasing and loading them into the car it was off to home.

The new dilemma is figuring out what designs we use. Scary, silly, happy, angry, surprised.....there are so many choices. Maybe a picture or a saying? We have about a week to decide and then comes the slimy pumpkin guts with lots of seeds included.

I'll post pictures soon. Happy Pre-Halloween!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

The Light flowed...

2010-10-12T00:29:00.006-04:00

Yesterday was the first day of my life.

To commence the very first day yesterday, I decided to do something I had been told to do by several knowledgeable people who have passed through my life including my former trainer. I decided to have breakfast.

Now, having breakfast may not seem like a big deal for some, but I have never really been an early morning eater. My best friend from back in the school days can attest that eating so early was not necessarily a good thing for me or the environment around me. I think I know why too.

I am a night owl. I think I was born a night owl. I remember being yelled at for not going to sleep as far back as two years old. I battled my mother for years until I developed stealthy techniques of playing in the dark or until my mom gave up and quit trying to enforce an unnatural sleep schedule. I remember listening to the golden age of radio and various shows on my clock radio after watching Johnny Carson on the television. I never understood why midnight was like daytime to me. And when the sun came up, I was ready for bed. The last thing I wanted to do was eat something as my body was ready to crash. Like a typical night owl, dinner was later than usual. That was just my life and my so-called circadian rhythm sleep disorder.

Anyways, I decided to break the mold yesterday and made breakfast to the delight of my teenage son. He was happy. I make breakfast every so often and he cherishes each time. So the morning started out with two happy campers....three if my old trainer only knew.

My next step in the rest of my life was going to the doctor. I haven't been in a while due to the lack of insurance, but the receptionist informed me they could get me in the same day and they had a new program for people like me. Wow, guess this day is getting better.

I was in for a bigger surprise when I found out that a couple of my prescriptions were free. Okay, Obama. I guess change is really good and comes with some perks aka blessings sometimes.

Later that day, I made contact with several people who have a positive place in my life. It felt like my positive attitude was being reinforced by fate. Over and over, I felt like life was actually working out. I could feel myself strengthen within like I gained more heart in the Legend of Zelda game. And then it happened....

I looked up. In the sky, it appeared. It felt like I was looking at one of the most amazing pictures. Up above, I saw the God rays. If you have ever seen them, you know how beautiful they are. They remind that of my place and purpose in this life and how small yet loved I am. Seeing the God rays yesterday was like getting a notice to shape up and enjoy every minute of it.

I agree. Time to let the light flow like it did yesterday.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Goodbye So Many

2010-10-11T05:11:00.003-04:00

Today is the first day of the rest of my life. At least that is what they say. For me, I believe it needs to be. It needs to be a day of change. Time to throw out the all the things clouding my life and prepare for some internal sunshine. I am missing the warmth and vitality that use to shine outward from me. I wonder if aging is tarnishing me or stress is rusting me out. I know I need to put a stop to this pretty quick because I can hear the clock ticking. It is reminding me that I am finite. Time is running against me. I can picture the sands in an hourglass moving full speed taking my life force with them. Then, I pause and look at the calendar.

For the past several months, I have been tending to many things. It is my nature to have too much to do. I like so many things, have so many projects and help so many people that sometimes I get lost in the mix. I have struggled for years with the so many this and the so many that. Now, it has grown to the so many these and the so many those. It is definitely time to cut back and down.

As a natural organizer and goal setter, you would think that this would be easy. No. Definitely not! It feels a little like hoarding or playing king of the hill with all my so manys. Which do I let go and which ones get to stay?

Thank goodness I have skills. Skills to recognize that today needs to be the first day, that I have to set realistic limitations/goals and that self-motivation needs to flow through me like specialized bodily fluid that delivers the necessary energy for my internal sunshine to blaze ever so brightly.

Today, I promise myself to take that first step and decide what I want my life to look like and what I need to do to get there. It may be one small step, but a freeing one. And a goodbye to a weighted life and so many.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Sick in spirit

2010-05-20T20:54:00.005-04:00

I have been chatting with the ex-husband since November. It was not something I ever imagine would happen. Our relationship ended on bad terms and the fallout was nuclear. I spent many years in fear and trying to heal. I put dating on hold and focused on kids, school and work while trying to reach internal peace. I was so happy when I realized I reached it and finally forgave him.

It had been almost twelve years. He had recently started talking to our daughter and was asking to speak to me. Initially, my answer was no. Why would I want to open that can of worms? Although all the wounds were healed, the scars were still there. It took a while before I finally agreed.

His voice was the same. I recognized it immediately. I felt a rush of warm feelings like I had found an old object I loved from my childhood. All the years that had passed disappeared and it felt like we were back where we left off.

I knew something was wrong near the beginning of the conversation. It was him talking, but something was off. He was homeless, jobless and penniless. And after his first tirade, I realized he was worst off mentally then when I left. As he went about describing our past, his memories told of a life that never existed. Whole experiences were missing and people forgotten. It upset him and the paranoia began.

When I hung up the phone, I was in tears. I could not believe how bad his life had become. I cried hard. After all I went through with him, I still cared and loved him. I was so heartbroken.

We began talking on a regular basis. I wanted to know about his life. I have been working with homeless for twenty years and hoped my experience would be helpful. He did his odd jobs to pay his cell bill, went to the pantry for food and clothes and slept on the beach at night. He was near a VA in case he got sick or hurt. Shockingly, he described his life in such a fabulous way which included swimming everyday in the ocean. To him, life was good.

I saw another picture. His schizophrenia was in full force. The paranoid behavior was constant. He always thought I was spying or recording him. And although he would go to the VA, he felt the government was too involved in his life. He wanted to be free with no responsibilities and he was living that on the beach.

I tried to connect him to services. I even had him go to a shelter. Too often, he wouldn't follow through and he'd leave the shelter to go back to the beach. He would get arrested every so often because they did not want homeless on the beaches with tourists. Usually, the charges were dropped and he went back to the beach.

One thing I know about people with a mental illness like his is that it is common for them to self-medicate. That includes the use and abuse of substances. I knew he was when he could. Some alcohol or some marijuana might not affect others like it does for someone mentally ill. But for him, it was something to help deal with life and the world surrounding him.

Even with all that, I still cared about his well-being. I asked him to call me every week to let me know he was okay. I was afraid something would happen to him and no one would notice. Usually, I looked forward to his calls, except when he was having one of his angry episodes. Although his illness affected our conversations, the connection between us was still there.

Towards the end of April, his calls stopped. All his calls went to voice until his phone service was shut off. Everything inside me said something was wrong. I kept trying and checking facebook to see if he logged on. Nothing.

Monday, I woke up sick to my stomach. Every part of me said something was wrong. I started searching for him. I wanted to see if I needed to report him missing. Then, I found him. I searched the courts in his city and found that he had been arrested and was in jail. After reviewing his charges and jumping to the jail website, I saw his face. It was bad.

He must have had a verbal altercation with the police that escalated. In the end, he was beat up and arrested. When I saw the picture, my heart broke. He looked so bad.

I contacted his brother and his mother. Only his mother responded. She said he had told her I was helping him. She was happy I was tuned in and that she knew he would not take his medication. Although I know she loves him, it felt like she had made peace that her son is gone into his own world. I guess everyone has been through a lot with him. Maybe now they understood what I went through with him so long ago.

He is sitting in jail right now. His arraignment is next week. I don't know what will happen. Maybe this time, he won't be so lucky. I want to write the judge and see him get help, but I know he doesn't want it.

I spoke to a friend today. She knows us both. She had been exposed to his illness back when we were married. She told me to follow my conscience no matter what it said. She said I have to do what brings me peace with this since it is causing my soul to ache.

If he gets prison time, I don't know how he will do. His illness does not do well around people. His paranoia affects his behavior and how he interacts with others. I would not be surprised if he didn't make it. Life behind bars is not easy especially where he lives.

I spoke with the kids about him. They are not really interested in him. I think the initial novelty of him has worn off. Both have seen his illness over the phone and would rather not deal with him, especially our son. He said some hurtful things and caused me pain that has angered our son. Saying "Momma's baby, poppa's maybe" didn't help. So now the son he always wanted, doesn't want him. Although our daughter is more forgiving, she lacks the patience to really tolerate him either. It makes me feel blessed to have the kids' love since I see now how freely it is not given.

Tomorrow, I will will write him. I want him to know that I still care and love him. I will decide if I will write the judge and ask for his assistance in getting my ex help with his illness. My mind weighs heavy at this moment and I don't know what to do. In the meantime, I will pray and ask God to guide me to do what is best and needed. And maybe that sick feeling in my spirit will leave and I will actually have the chance to see the one time love of my life again.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Heartbreak

2010-05-12T10:18:00.004-04:00

I am suffering a personal tragedy today. Although I knew the possibility was there, I was hopeful. Instead, my nightmare came true. In what seemed like forever, my heart was broken into a million pieces last night.

Now, I understand how finicky love can be. Various factors come into to play and can lead to a positive connection or the lack of one. Sometimes, it builds over a period of time, while for others it takes an instant. Either way, it comes with strong feelings and great chemical releases.

I have been flying high on these wonderful feelings lately. My loyalty and love given so freely felt reciprocated and appreciated. I really thought this was the one. The timing was perfect and it seemed that the stars were all aligned. My heart said it was meant to be and even my brain agreed. This was the real deal and this time is was going to work.

I felt so blind-sided last night. I was so busy celebrating my happiness, I forgot how fragile this relationship really was. Over minutes, it went from good to bad to ugly. I was shocked. So shocked that I did not cry, but felt the mourning process turn on. I felt so abandoned and alone and dragged through the mud. But mainly, I just felt disappointed. Something I believed in so strongly failed and failed badly.

Today is a new day. I have a new perspective. Although last night ended so badly, the love is still there. I still believe it can work out. It may seem delusional, but miracles do happen. Maybe, I will be blessed with that great happiness again. I still believe my loyalty will pay off and my support will be appreciated. I guess the next few days will tell me the outcome of this relationship. Will I decide to keep pursuing or jump ship permanently. We shall see, but the Cleveland Cavaliers need to get their stuff together and play with the heart and talent they have. It is time for the love of the game and the love of Cleveland and the fans to triumph. You guys are going to have to fight and fight hard. But, you have me and the rest of the loyal supporters backing you up. You messed up last night. Ok, we are over it. And for the next two games, make us proud and show the world why we love you so much. Go Cavs!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Springing Forward

2010-04-20T13:48:00.003-04:00

It is nice when the weather begins to warm up. The trees begin their budding process and flowers start emerging. As everything outside awakens to a new season, I have come to realize that I am entering a new phase in my life.

I have been a mother for almost 18 years. It has been a long haul with a multitude of challenges and rewards. In two years, my busy family life will slow down as my house becomes an empty nest. I will be 40 and finally on my own. It really has me thinking now about what my life will be like.

I read that Oprah said that turning 40 should be fabulous. I agree. So, for the next two years, I will focus myself on growing, losing, learning, loving, laughing and becoming the best of me that I can. And when I blow out the 40 candles on my cake, I will have nothing to wish for except more time to enjoy life. Yes, I have definitely entered a new season and continue to move forward.

Be fabulous and enjoy life everyone!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

April's Fool

2010-04-01T13:29:00.000-04:00

When I was 19, I lived with my high school best friend, Lys, on my days off from my job. As ghetto as the neighborhood was, I enjoyed making new friends. Although my second love and I were on the outs, I was still a little gun-shy about dating someone new. On the other hand, Lys was ready to help me forget and enjoy being young and single. Maybe as some form of encouragement, I was introduced to her boyfriend's brother. After realizing how wrong we were, it was easy to move on. Summer was coming and it was time to just enjoy my days off hanging out with Lys and my new friends.

I don't remember our first conversation or even our first introduction. I just remember sitting on Lys's couch and talking with him. I knew quickly that he was different from the other guys.

He had a wonderful voice that stood out. It was rich and smooth sounding like expensive hot chocolate. I felt like I could listen to him forever. We talked about many things and had such a great connection. But, fall came and we both headed off to different colleges and the relationship ended.

Five years later, fate intervened and we crossed paths again. It was instant emotions and we reunited. It was so good being with him again, except for the fear. I just keep feeling like it would not last. Every time I saw him, I felt like it would be the last time ever seeing him again. I told myself that it was my father/daughter abandonment issues and hoped for the best. And although love was there, our lives were heading in two different directions. Eventually, it ended with inspiring words from him to follow my path even though he wasn't in it. I was heartbroken. In the last conversation, we agreed to look for each other every four years.

As the years went by, I never found him. I looked, but it was as if he disappeared off the face of the earth. I felt reality was saying it was over for good and it was never meant to be. That upset me, but not more than the possibility that he could be dead. I kept telling myself that he was fine and happy with someone else. I could handle that reality easier, but I still had a part of my heart still yearning for him.

Well, fate is interesting and amazing at the same time. Or maybe it is destiny that should get the credit. (Flash scenes from "The Notebook" and cue romantic music) But recently, it crossed two paths again.

Now, Facebook is place to make social connections. I just never thought it would be the key to finding him again. After 14 years, there he was on my monitor. That soon led to a conversation and a rush of emotions, all from our paths crossing online.

We are rekindling now. It has been almost a two decades since we met, but the butterflies are just the same. I feel so happy and trying my best to live in the moment with no fears. He really is the only person who understood me at such a deep level, even on areas on my life that I don't discuss. Maybe third time is the charm or maybe we are old enough to handle it. I don't know where this will all lead although I know where I want it to lead. Fate can be fickle and life's complications can be barriers. But, I know that I have skills know that I never had then to help overcome the roadblocks. And I know, I'd like him to be right next to me facing each one. We will see.

But for now, I'll be the fool.....the fool in love.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

It's Her.

2010-03-23T10:49:00.008-04:00

I have been thinking of her lately. It is not that I want to think of her or enjoy thinking of her. She just keeps entering my mind and streaks across my thoughts throughout the day. Every time she appears, my smile fades.

I remember when I met her. It was at her house. She was casually folding clothes on her blue sofa in the den. She was sitting next to someone that would be in my life for the next couple years. Her attitude was cavalier and concerned me. It was possible that she would be in my future for a long time, attitude and all. Did I really want this? Would it improve in time?

Later, I would realize that the attitude would only get worse. She had never heard of that saying about throwing rocks at glass houses. And she didn't throw rocks either, she heaved boulders. I learned quickly that her most hurtful assaults would be privately to my face or publicly veiled in kindness.

It went on for years. I tried to thicken my nerve sheaths without losing my heart's kindness. Eventually, I began to expect the stony material to appear flying towards me. My reflexes went on high alert in her presence. I knew I needed to stay away, but that opportunity had not availed itself until....

Finally, the nail was hit on the head, the stars aligned, a door opened, fate intervened and the BM hit the fan. I could finally walk away.

When I think about it now, I think I sprinted. I didn't look back. I just kept moving forward creating positive kinetic energy as I healed from the damage she caused. I knew everything would eventually be okay. I knew the the scars would become my shield of strength when needed and I could forgive her for the unkindness.

I was surprised yesterday when my mind's door opened and she was standing there. I have seen her current picture recently and know that time has affected her. But in my thoughts, she looked the same. It was as if this selection of my memory was frozen to years before. Still, I smiled. Because with just a blink, I thought of something joyful and she was gone. And I smiled and was happy again.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Pulled

2010-03-14T12:24:00.006-04:00

I am being pulled in many directions. So many opportunities and only one me. It reminds me of many struggles I have had with liking too many things and not settling on one. Can a person really be too diversified?

I find it fascinating that as much as I love diversity and variety in my life, I can be so adamant and rigid about little things. A good example is wall art. If I decorate a wall, it must be symmetrical on each side of the imaginary middle line my brain places on the wall. If there is a sconce on the right side, believe me, a sconce will be on the left too. But, if it is a small place like the shelves of my bookcase, symmetry does not prevail. I just have to like the item for it to win a viewable spot.

Crazy as it sounds, it is my normal. I have been trying to figure out why I am like this. Why does my brain have all of these crazy little rules that bring a preference into my life like a mild OCD. I believe there are many possibilities that led to this way of existence.

In regards to wall art, I think Home Interior was a negative influence. My mother held Home Interior parties at our house while I was growing up. I was quite involved and enjoyed the whole process of hosting a party. I was even given my own book to make my own purchases via my mother's credit card. I loved watching the hostess show off the displays. She said time and time again about balancing the items on the wall. If you added a mirror on one side of the picture, you should balance it out with a mirror on the other side. As a adult, I see the sales technique in that pitch. As a child, I did not and thought it was just a pretty display. I still love Home Interior. Their displays are just as beautiful today as when I was little, but only if they are symmetrical in my mind.

The second major influence in decorating a wall arises in my mathematical/engineering thought process. I believe my mind uses algebra constantly. If x+3=4, then x=1. Both sides of the equal sign must be balanced with the same amount. If 4 is on one side, 4 will be on the other. If there are one small picture and candle on this side, there should be one small picture on the other. Again, my mind has that imaginary middle line/equal sign on every wall I look at. Cursed by algebra, I say.

My best friend says it is just my personal taste, but I still believe I have been influenced. What I have seen from my DNA, I come from a wherever family. That leads to one conclusion. Somewhere in my universe, nature tainted me. So now I must fight nature and my own mental influence to remain open to ideas beyond me and the boundaries I have created.

I am still being pulled. So many things I want to do, but only so much time to do them. I need to figure out what will best inspire me and propel my inner growth. Save the world my heart screams. Save yourself my mind yells back. Guess I am back to making a list of the pros and cons and praying for enlightenment. I need to find which brings balance to my life. Both sides of me....my heart and my mind....need it. See, even in my own being, I am symmetrical. Maybe it is homeostasis that is at blame. Yeah, that is it.

New plan. Fault homestasis, save the cheerleader and choose the path that brings me the greatest joy. Sounds good to me. You?

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Spring Fever has landed!

2010-03-11T10:16:00.007-05:00

I seriously have spring fever. I want to plant and clean and barbeque. Call me crazy, but the warm sunshine has put some pep in my little side step. Even if it rains Saturday, I am going to "get my grill on"!

Are you coming?

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Tick Tock....Tick Tock

2010-03-10T10:39:00.005-05:00

I hear it. Every day it becomes louder and clearer. The ticking is tocking and I can no longer ignore it. The alarm clock in my life is sounding off. It is time. Time to begin to manifest the dreams of my legacy.

Lucky for me, I have good people around me with helping hands. Some of them are ready to begin the building of the foundation of what will come. Others will offer their skills later on specific points. Together, we have the opportunity the make the difference that each of us desires.

I am excited to see the faces this weekend as the brainstorming begins. My dream.....their dream.....our dream will begin. It may start with a prayer, but will end with a plan of action.

I still hear it. Tick Tock....Tick Tock.....This internal clock is still reminding me. This is very important. There are many people who will benefit from our dedication. If we do it right, it will affect people for generations. I hope at least seven. Just like in my culture.... In every deliberation, we must consider the impact of our decisions on the next seven generations. That is how serious this is.

And soon, I will be too busy to listen to the ticking clock. I will be trying to keep up with the ball that is rolling! Yeah!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

I need to....

2010-03-09T13:08:00.005-05:00

It's been awhile again. I love to write, but for whatever reason I have been putting it off. I don't even know why. As I sit hear and think, I wonder what negative thought or feeling could be causing me to not do something I love.

All the typical reasons run through my brain. It's not time. I can and will make time to do the things I enjoy. I'm not scared of writing online either. I've done it for so long that my blog house feels safe and comfortable. I write down the thoughts and memories in my head and understand that it is just my experience and perspective. Inside, I just keep feeling forced to sit and share. But yet, I am here and trying to do it yet again. It is kind of like riding a bicycle.

I clearly remember my first bike. I was so happy when my grandfather gifted me with my first two-wheeled bike. It was terra-cotta orange with a big brown banana seat. I was four and on cloud nine. Although I hated birthdays due to everyone staring at me (another story), I loved presents. My grandfather knew this and was so kind to bring that bike over when only my mother was there. To all the other girls on the block, it was a color nightmare. But to me, it was perfect for a Cleveland Brown's fan. The cowboy and American Indian decals were an added symbolic bonus. It represented both my grandparents in a quiet way that made me smile to myself.

My bike created a new feeling in me. Having your own transportation is so empowering, even for a four year old. It brought me a taste of independence. My blue big wheel had been wonderful for getting around as a 2 and 3 year old, but the limitations of the driveway left me feeling caged like a wild beast. As powerful as the big wheel was, I was still left pacing up and down the driving just like an animal does at the zoo. I just wanted to go farther and faster. I want to be like the other big kids and cruise down the sidewalk. I yearned to ride down the long path that looked like it went on forever. I could feel the sidewalk tease me too as it cut across the driveway. It was so close and seemed so easy to pedal my way on that road, but my mother's rules kept me bound.

The new bike brought new rules. I was allowed to cruise the sidewalk in front of my house, but I was forced to have training wheels added. At that point, I didn't care. Just whip them on and let's go was all I wanted to do.

I learned the hard way that riding a bike takes some practice. I don't know learning to balance and multi-task on a bike was such an important part of riding a two-wheeled bike. Trust me, it is and you need to learn it quick. Practice included many falls ans would include some scrapes and bruises. It looks easy enough when the other kids rode by on their bikes. But for some like me,it was a big challenge and at times a little bloody. But still, I rode. I graduated up the bike path to a teen-speed with hand brakes and many gears. That independence took me to new distances across my city and with many friends. At one point, the neighbor joined in the journeys.

I rode a bicycle until I was 17. After getting my license and becoming an official driver of the family Honda, my bike was moved to the back of the garage. Eventually, the fabulous ten-speed of my teens became a yard sale special. Every once in a while, the opportunity to ride again would come and I would do it willingly. As I got older, getting back on the bike got harder and less fun. Falls could now lead to broken bones and medical bills. Riding became a risk and risks can be scary.

It only takes one memory for me to get back on a bicycle. It is remembering that sensation of the wind blowing across my face and in my hair. That very moment when you stretch out your arms, hold your face to the sun and smile is so peaceful and free to me. Yeah, I may wobble at first as I adjust my balance, but soon my skill takes over as my confidence builds. Then like before, I am riding.

Writing again feels like that. I don't know the risks I fear, but I remember the wonderful feeling it brought me as I wrote. I remember the independence I felt as I liberated each story upon the world. As for my skills, they never went anywhere. I may wobble at first, but as long as I keep writing, my skills will grow. I will continue to overcome boundaries like just that four year old me did long ago.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Abandonment and Liberation

2009-07-04T00:33:00.011-04:00

I guess I am ready. I have been waiting my whole life for this moment. Finally, after all these years, I guess I am really ready. It begins with a story. It is a story many people know, but a few do not. Some have been keep in the dark, but not I. I have always known, but have kept quiet. To have compassion for people I have not met, I have been silent and respectful. But the day has come for me to let go of the feelings I no longer want and the words associated by it. Today, I will share the story that will help in my liberation. And, isn't it fitting that it is the 4th of July.....Independence Day.

My Story....

I have been told that my parents were high school sweethearts. Although my father lived in the local group home, my mother saw wonderful things in him. I guess it worked out well for awhile. That is until the summer before their senior year. The relationship fell apart. Before they parted ways, they exchanged some good-bye passion. Nine months later, I was born. Although my mother was overwhelmed, she managed to graduate and support me. My father was a different case.

Many people have told me stories about my dad. I have heard about his troubled childhood. I was informed that his own father had died when his mother was pregnant with him. They said his mother had a breakdown and Children Services had to remove my dad and his siblings from the home. It was explained that his siblings carried my infant dad into the woods to hide from Children Services at first, but were safely found.

I can't imagine what that was like. The pain and struggle it can cause. I wonder if it affects him today....

The story always jumps here to the adolescent years. My dad was taken in by a family. His last name changed as he sported glasses and blond hair. I don't know why is didn't last forever. He ended up at a group home attending AHS. His name went back from S. to B. Even my aunts and his friends said he was a good guy in high school. That is until the break-up and the aftermath.

I assume that he did not want to be tied down as a teen dad. It can be alot to balance and to be responsible for. He didn't have the best experience from the stories I heard and was now tied to someone he was no longer dating. He probably had grand dreams for his future and wanted other things for himself. It was just a good-bye, but it was becoming a hello. How would he choose to handle it?

I spoke with a friend of his once. He told me that when I was born, my dad felt he needed to remain separate from me. He wanted a chance out of life and could not do that with a child. He wanted to marry in a catholic church and do things the right way. The whole situation was a mistake he wished he could undo. In the process of putting space between himself and me, he said many negative things about my mother and denied being my father. He accused others including his friends. Maybe it was fear or inexperience or lack of maturity, but it would be the path everyone would be forced to walk down.

I don't know if I should say luckily or what, but he was found to be my father in a court of law. He was ordered to pay child support and his name was placed on my birth certificate. I officially became his daughter.

Yeah, right? This is where the story should fill me with happiness, but sadly it doesn't. I may have gained a father, but I really acquired something else. I gain a superpower. I became invisible.....invisible to him.

My mom and everyone else always told me that it was probably better that he was not involved in my life. I never knew if that was true, but I had other truths in my life. It was true that he was never in my life. He never gave me a present or celebrated anything with me. He wasn't there to protect or comfort me. He never visited me or checked on me when I has ill or hurt. He just never was.....

On the other hand, the picture I had of him was completely created in my mind. Yes, I had the stories to help mold my vision of him. But, it was my imagination that gave him the appearance of Tom Selleck and the voice of Mr. Roger. He had the kindness of Puff the Magic Dragon and the strength of Superman. Who he truly was, I had no clue. No picture or video to help me understand who my father was except the stories of others and the invisibility I endured.

My parents worked together at a utility company. I think my mother was surprised to find herself working so close with my father. Everyone at the plant knew about the situation. I was even on his family health plan. Yet, through all of the company picnics and outings I went to, I never met him. I was in his presence I was told, but never knew it.

It facinates me to know that although we have never met, we knew things about each other. He knew about me going to France and activities I participated in. I knew about his wife and when they had children. He has been told about each of my graduations. I knew where he lived and the truck he drove. He knew when I married and had children. I knew we both donate blood and have bad migraines. He knows his brother has met me. I know that people say I look like his sister.

I think invisibilty sucks. It is a power I wish he would take back. I have felt abandoned most of my life by him. Not so much as anger, but as sadness. There are many words that go through my head...."Am I not good enough to be his daughter?"....."Why doesn't he want me?"...."Will he ever accept me or my children?" I do not know the answers to these questions. Only he has the answers and he never shares them.

Well, something struck me today. I was looking up the word abandoned in the dictionary for my step-daughter. Towards the bottom of the page for the definition of abandoned, it says neglected child. It shocked me in a personal way. I finally found a word I connect to in regards to my realtionship with my dad. I feel neglected. Maybe he paid child support every month, but I am more faceted than that as a person. Money or even health insurance doesn't buy love. That's what I needed and that's what I wanted. I want to be loved, but I want him to choose to want to love me. At this point, I don't even know if he is capable.

I was told a story once. They said my dad had to make me non-existent to marry in a catholic church. That was the day I was given my superpower and became invisible. After years of being invisible, I am ready for my liberation. It is time to celebrate independence from being a dirty secret. It is a burden I no longer will carry.

I would like to apologize for the pain my freedom will bring to others. Freedom always comes at a cost. Remember, some people live in the dark and do not know the stories I share. For my siblings, J. and B., it will be eye-opening. For I have always known about them, yet they never knew about me. I am so happy he was there for them...coaching little league, birthdays, holidays and just life in general. May they give forgiveness to those who hid me like I have. And maybe one day, the invisibility will fade and they will choose to love me too.

Life is short. I hope it works out. Plus, I have two rugratz here who would love to know the rest of their family. I guess we will see where this story leads....

....to be continued.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Da Butt

2009-06-28T11:30:00.005-04:00

Do you have a song that just makes you get up and dance? You know the one where you say "That's my song!" and get up and shake your booty. You know all the words and possibly some special dance moves. I have a song like that. It is from a long time back, but it still stirs my excitement and makes me want to get up and shake my butt. "Da Butt" by EU was that song.

I am not an attention seeker. I don't like people watching me. I remember my fourth birthday very clear when it was time to sing "Happy Birthday" to me. I cried and tried to hide behind my mother. It didn't matter if I knew everyone in the room or that that they were all people who loved me. I did not like people looking at me. I dreaded every birthday when it was time for that song. And it wasn't just the song....it was the opening of the presents. Everyone wanted to watch and see what you were gifted and see your reaction. I love presents. So....it was torture for me to open them in front of everyone. I always wanted to move all the presents to a back room and open them in private. That would have made me the happiest. Instead, my family made me go through the charade of being happy and excited. Oh...the fake joy! I was happy when the party was over and everyone left or moved on to other things. I would then quietly appreciate the presents and the love that was given with them.

Today, I do public speaking as part of my job. I am very comfortable speaking in public to large groups. I am even comfortable when I speak at a prison helping offenders connect to community resources and learn job-seeking skills. I also enjoy speaking to small groups as I do when I teach various classes. It seems that it is the in-between that affects me the most. If it is under 10 or over 50, I am good. There is no anxiety. But, that in-between generates the nervousness. It feels like the "Happy Birthday" song is about to be sung. I can get through it, but it feels a little painful during the process.

When it comes down to it, I was just very shy. Still feel shy today even though most people would say the opposite. I don't mind being in the spotlight as needed for work, but in my private life I avoid it. This includes when I am out with friends in a social setting. I am not a wallflower. I like to mingle and connect with others. But....I will never be the first one on the dance floor. Even if no one is looking, I can't do it. There is one exception to the rule. It is the "Da Butt" song. If I hear it, I will jump up out of my seat and shake it like I don't care. You'll probably hear me say "They're playing my song!" too. And for a moment or two, it doesn't matter how many eyes are watching or how shy I am. It is like I am alone with all my presents and enjoying each one.....feeling like the queen of the world.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Busy, Busy....and a can of paint.

2009-06-27T18:46:00.003-04:00

Work has definitely kept me busy lately. It is great too because I like to push myself. As my programs are growing and expanding, I look forward to helping that many more. I have always been a helper person. I am willing to volunteer all the time. Sometimes, to my detriment because there are only 24 hours in the day.

I have noticed my energy level dropping recently. I have been wondering if I am over-doing life a little bit. Usually, it is give...give...give. Now, my body is screaming no...no...no.

I guess I'll live without having a productive Saturday. The living room will have to be painted another day. It's pale white walls will have to remain pasty and bland. At least another room will see color today. I did pick up the can of paint my baby girl needed to finish painting her room. It is a pretty color called Meditation Blue. I can't wait until she finishes. We are both excited.

Sometimes, it is important to rest and sometimes it is important to have color in your life. Luckily, I have both...just not in the living room.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

The Return.....and an update

2009-04-10T11:03:00.004-04:00

Hello.

It has been awhile. When I came back to my blog, I realized it looked like I dropped off the face of the earth. Well, I didn't. I may have lost a few more brain cells, but the rugratz and me are doing ok in Buckeye Land.

I did get some interesting new last year in my absence. My neurologist seems to believe I have early on-set alzheimer's. I thought he was crazy at first. I am not that old and I have kids in school. But sure enough, my memory is fading faster than I thought. I realized a few days ago with many tears that I can not recollect any birthdays before 2007. It is like they are gone. It is frustrating to have such a good memory and then have it fail you. My big brain is now average size...lol!

So, for the 6 to 13 years they say I have left on this dear planet, I plan to document all the things I can remember. I want my rugratz and their children to have the stories that have been passed to me. Until I get the cool video cam to record myself, I will continue to utilize this blog to document my journey in written form. You are welcome to join me.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Final Countdown

2007-07-05T22:53:00.001-04:00

I have lived in my apartment for eight of the last nine years. It has been such a place of stability for my kids too. I have been dreading the day when we would have to move. It felt like I would lose the stability and have to start all over. We moved to Minnesota after the divorce. It was our safe haven after many moments of fear and having to hide. I wanted to quit looking over my shoulder and Minnesota offered that. It took a long time for me to relax, but I eventually did....at least a little. But now, it seems it is time to go home.

I have a cool job here, but I lack a place to move into. I have seen mobile homes on one acre go for $100,000. I found a few decent places, but they wanted $1,200 and $1,400 a month plus utilities. My income can't handle that demand. Cheaper ones were small and I saw a few that I think people died there. They were so icky. I just wanted to run.

There is good news. I found a new place for us in the Cleveland area. I love it. It is perfect. The management guy phoned me the other day to tell me I could have the apartment if I had a job there. They need to know I can pay rent every month. It is understandable. Now, I just need a job. Can I pull off a job in the next three weeks? We will see. My mom's house is our back-up, but I'd like to just move to our own place.

The other day, the neighbor gave me hope. She is looking in Colorado. She had a job interview over the phone and may have gotten it. I just need some of that luck now. I will be so happy to be near my family. And....I'll just be two blocks from my best friend. Life would be so good.

In the mean time, it is sending out resumes, packing our stuff and getting ready for the biggest yard sale of my life. I only want to move the basics. Dressers, living room set, and so many other things will have to go. May I only feel lightened when it is all over.

Keep us in your prayers as we take this leap.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

G as in Great!

2007-07-03T13:14:00.000-04:00

I found out my blog was rated G. What is your blog rated as?

Check here!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Woman to Woman

2007-07-01T00:07:00.000-04:00

No matter how big your umbrella is,
sometimes you still get wet.

- MzAriez
I created that saying many years back. I was going through some things. I was trying hard to keep chaos out of my life, but for some reason, it kept finding its way in. All I wanted was peace in my life and some stability. I worked hard for it too. Then, something would happen to bring chaos back to my forefront. No matter how hard I tried to prepare with taking extra precautions, it would still happen. After reflecting over the years, I have learned a thing or two about the weather in my life.

Weather Lesson #1 - You can predict the weather, but you can't guarantee it.

Do the best you can to prepare, but accept that life can be unpredictable. Mother Nature/Fate plays by their own rules which of course we never get a copy.

Weather Lesson #2 - It can rain and shine at the same time.

Have you ever heard someone say that their best day was their worst day. It happens. It is like yin and yang. I believe the good part reminds you to have hope during a bad time. To me, a rainbow truly represents balance. Hope keeps you going when the rain pours and is often represented as a rainbow. Now, tell me what has to occur for a rainbow to appear? Yeah, rain and shine.

Weather Lesson #3 - Rain will eventually stop.

People will always have problems of some sort. Life is about challenges. There are many lessons to learn. Eventually, the rain will stop. There are always moments of peace when the sun shines. They may be short and fleeting, but you will find your moments. Don't forget the clouds can only hold so much rain.

Weather Lesson #4 - Rain will usually not kill you, but lightning is another thing.

Some people struggle with life. They haven't mastered the skill of balancing and continue to make poor choices or take unnecessary risks. It is not wise to stand in the rain and wave a large metal rod at lightning. Be bright in another way. This type of electricity is short-lived and overrated. It may be hard to deal with a downpour, but total destruction is hard to recover from if even possible. Keep yourself safe during a storm, you'll appreciate it later when things get better.

And don't forget....

You may get a little wet in life, but they are many ways to dry off. Got towels?

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Thinking about it

2007-06-29T01:55:00.000-04:00

Can you hear it?

I can hear it.

Shhh..... Listen.

Can you hear it now?

It's Cleveland.

And I think it is calling me home.

I moved to Minnesota in 1998. I didn't know anybody here, but my tribe was here and countless relatives I had never met. It would be the perfect opportunity to raise the kids in the culture my grandmother taught me. Plus, I could finish college and make everyone proud.

Lately, it feels like my stay here in the Too Cold, Minnesota is ending. I miss my family and friends in Ohio. My mom is still holding my beautiful Meeko Da Moo cat hostage there. My best friend, Kelley just bought a house outside Cleveland and is making the area her permanent home. I am almost done with school. I have no where to live as of the end of August and places here are pretty expensive and crappy. My kids want to go back and be near their grandparents and friends. Like I said, all signs point to the Buckeye.

Now, there is the flip side. I have family connections in Minnesota. I enjoy the Native culture here. I"ll have my license to teach soon. I am employed. All of us have friends here. I like my job and the kids I work with. I still can learn much by staying here.

I guess when it comes down to it, Ohio looks more promising. Still, there are two things that need to happen to leave. First, we need a place to live. It needs to be decent, reasonable and near Kel since she is one of my greatest supports. Secondly, I need to find a job that can support my family. I have already started looking, but I have mixed emotions about the jobs available. In general, I am very excited, but very uneasy. It all seems so quick.

Do you know what one of the things I dread the most? Packing and moving all our stuff! Either way I have to move. That means I have to pack. I have 9 years of buildup in my house. It is time to downscale in a major way. The neighbor and I are planning a large sale in July. I'll be on ebay soon to get rid of some of our other items. Hopefully, this process will be successful and leave me feeling relieved and not regretful.

July is the big month here. I need to decide where my path leads. Minnesota or Ohio? I guess we will all see soon. Wish me luck!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Lost and Found

2007-06-28T03:38:00.000-04:00

I think it was in a movie when I first heard this fabulous background music. I kept thinking it was "Boomerang" for some reason. When I went back and reviewed the movie, I realized it wasn't in it. That song must had been in another 80's or 90's movie, I just couldn't remember which one.

I remember my excitement back in the day when my ex-husband gave me a mix tape and that song was on it.

LOL! Mix tapes....remember those! It was such an 80's thing to make compilation of songs on blank cassettes. The quality was questionable at times, especially if you recorded off the radio. You tried hard to cut the radio announcer's voice off or to keep background noises to a minimum. One goal was to never have your parent screaming for you by your nickname in the background of a song. It was fun to even edit by cutting the tape reel and connecting back with scotch tape. Oh, the things when did back then after 8 tracks, but before cds! LOL!

Anyways, you won't believe the sadness I felt when that tape was lost forever. I had played that tape so much that a few parts were very worn. It skipped for a second here and there from my retaping it back together. I never even knew the name of the song or who created it. Mix tapes usually lacked that kind of information. There I was, back in that same boat. Once again, the search for my song was on.

I have no clue as to how many record store workers and music fanatics I have sung the melody of that song to in order to help identify it. It was much to no avail. I never thought it would take me almost 15 years for the answer. What's interesting is that tonight, my daughter put the movie "Glitter" with Mariah Carey on. As we watched it, my song came on in the movie. I was so happy to find it again. After some searching through the music listed in the movie, I found the name and artist. Yeah!

My daughter said I should thank her for finding it again. I did, too. She is my special baby girl. Which reminded me, the day I went into labor with her, was the day I saw "Boomerang" at the theater. I remember the contractions I had, but ignored while I watched Eddie Murphy win the heart of Halle Berry. It was such a good movie. I didn't want to miss it. I figured I would never get the chance to see it if I ended up in the hospital. Back then, movies like "Boomerang" or others with primarily minorities in the cast never spent longer than a week at our small town movie theater. Plus, movies took forever to get to video.

Funny how things connect in my life. So, I guess in a 15 year span, I was finally able to connect my song to "Boomerang" after all.

BTW, the song is "Moments of Love" by Art of Noise. I posted the video below.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Wordless Wednesday

2007-06-27T07:18:00.000-04:00

Lake Erie

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Lumpy Bumpy Chili

2007-01-14T00:23:00.002-05:00

We had a chili cook-off at work a couple months back. I was excited to test my cooking skills. Most of the staff decided to take on the challenge and so now it was on.

When I hear the word chili, I think of my grandmother. My grandma was an excellent cook. She even cooked for various organizations as a job for awhile. Although she had no formal training, she could take a few simple things and make a masterpiece. She had so many great recipes in her repertoire which she kept solely in her head. Good for her, bad for the rest of us after she passed. One of her great dishes was her famous chili. It was beany and hot. It was best to eat it after it was refrigerated and still a little cold. It was just that hot, but the only way we wanted it. It tasted wonderful and it was always made with her love for us. Definitely, it was the best kind. Luckily, I spent quite a bit of my childhood with grandma, including endless hours in the kitchen. Over time, I gained some skills of my own from her. Although I never perfected her exact recipe, I have learned to alter what I did witness her do to my tastes. And over the years, I have made changes to it to create new versions of my family chili.

It was now time to up my game. It was a challenge and I have a rep to protect so to say. That's when one moment in the grocery store, shopping for chili supplies, changed my mind to create a new version of chili for my family and co-workers. Just a moment in the meat department caused the creation of Lumpy Bumpy Chili.

The day of the cook-off was busy. It was a parent-teacher conference day. There were so many crockpots plugged in the kitchen. We even had three bread makers working their magic adding to the wonderful aroma in the building. It was a little nerve-racking waiting throughout the day. I tried to watch people's reactions as they tasted to see if there was any clue as to their favorite. Even our school board members came and voted on their favorite chili. At the end of the day, after all the parents and students had left, the annoucements came. Much to my enjoyment, Lumpy Bumpy Chili was the winner! Yeah!

Well lately, the weather in Too Cold has been just that...too cold. I figured today was definitely a chili day. After eating a bowl of wonderful chili, I decided to see what other chili competitions were out there. Maybe I really had a winner. That's when I found the International Chili Society. Now, I could really test my chili. I was so wrong. After ready the rules, I learned that what I considered was chili and what they considered chili were two different things. Chili must have beans in my book and topping make it complete. So, since I can't become Internation Chili Champion, I decided to share my recipe here. I cook often by sight and taste so I don't have exact measurements. Good luck and enjoy!

Lumpy Bumpy Chili

Cut up celery, onion, green peppers, yellow peppers, red peppers. You need enough to fill 1/4 of your chili pot. Cook with some butter/margarine (I use I Can't Believe it's Not Butter.) until the onions shine and the veggies just start to get a little soft. Next, I add many cans of beans. Usually, it is 3 cans of chili beans, two cans of dark red kidney beans, two cans of light red kidney beans, and a can of any other bean I have.....usually vegetarian beans. After the beans, I add Ialian style stewed tomatoes. At least one can should have green chiles in it. The kind I get is usually sliced. Before adding them in, I squish them by hand to break them into smaller pieces. This should bring the contents of your chili pot to the half-full level. I use the tomatoe cans to add water. I fill the pot a little past 3/4 full. Next, I add my seasoning....2 chili seasoning packets (usually low sodium), garlic salt, pepper, Italian seasoning, Lawry's Seasoning Salt, basil, cumin, parsley, thyme, a couple bay leaves and chili powder. I stir it well and leave it on medium heat. Then, I use a cup of the chili liquid and begin to cook a frying pan full of some cubed chuck steak and some ground chuck. I season the meat with more Lawry's, Worcestershire Sauce, garlic salt, and a special seasoning that I put on everything called Nebraska Steak Salt, which is made and sold by the actual Mannheim Steamrollers. Don't cook it all the way. Just begin to brown it. Then, add it to the chili pot. This should bring your level to full. Let it cook on medium for a couple hours. Continue stirring every 20 minutes or so. Add more seasoning to suit your tastebuds as needed. I try not to add more seasoning until the last half hour.

While it is cooking, it is time to make the cold topping. Take a container of sour cream and a small container of french onion chip dip. Add some chives and mix well. Next, add shredded colby, montery jack, cheddar and mozzarella cheese. It should be heavy on the cheese that when you mix it, the cheese pokes out like quills in a porcupine. In this recipe, cheese is good. Keep in the refrigerator until it is time to serve.

Finally, when everything is done, remove the bay leaves from the pot and add chili to a bowl. Then, add a spoon of topping. Mix just a little, but not overly. It should look like winter has arrived in your chili, not just orange liquid. Eat with cornbread, crackers or fresh bread. Enjoy!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Not Laughing

2007-01-10T19:03:00.000-05:00

I got an email from classmates.com recently. It said that someone had signed my profile there and was thinking of me now. I read that and wondered who it could be. I had just been back home and wonder if word had spread. I always try for the low profile, but sometimes that doesn't work in a small town.

I clicked the button to see who was peeping me out. Boy, was I surprised! I mean damn, the heavens and earth are moving for this one! It was Benji, my first love. Awww, how sweet, you say, right? Wrong! It's how sick.

Benji died in 1988. It was one of the most tragedic moments from my high school memories. It's ok now. I survived, made peace and kept rolling with life. But no matter what, it never takes away the fact that he was my first love and will forever reign with that title and that moment in my past.

I wonder who did it. I still don't know.

Classmates is investigating. They sent me their apology and that they would take care of this matter. I hope that whoever posted it is blessed with some awareness. I am sure I am not the only surprised one to see Benji making online connections since a whole profile was created for him.

My initial sadness faded quick. Many memories of happy times flooded my mind. Somehow, he still manages to be part of my life and thoughts. That's cool. It's nice to be reminded that I have someone special out there.

Somehow through prank or wondering down memory lane, I have realized that I am not alone or forgotten afterall.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

2 out of 4

2007-01-03T20:27:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was a day for journeying home. It reminds me of a collector's plate I bought long ago painted by Vel Miller. It was titled "Journey Home" and it always reminded me of me and the rugratz. Wherever I go, they follow right behind....big sister and little brother. This journey in the sky represents us going home in both directions. One to our former and future home and second to our current adobe.

Well, the flight home was interesting. Let's start with the flight from Cleveland to Minneapolis. We were suppose to leave at 7:00 a.m. promptly. We boarded the plane like we were leaving at 7:00 a.m., but that didn't happen. I noticed after getting on the plane that it was dark and cold. After a little while the captain announced that we had no auxillary power. He said the people who flew thw plane the night before did not inform maintenance of this issue. It was ok for now, but that we would have no heat, cold air, lights, and some small systems were not running. He said he would get things going soon as we started the engines and could move over to have our wings defrosted. That was all he said. It was about 7 a.m. that time. During this time, a sound like a car horn was going non-stop. I wondered if this was a warning that we had no auxillary power. As we sat there with over a hundred people, we listened to the luggage people scream and yell and bang beneath us. Then, there were some really big bangs and some quietness outside. The car horn sound still blaring. As the airplane began to get stuffy, the captain spoke again. He informed us that an airport truck backed into the plane and hit the luggage door which would no longer close. He said maintenance was working on it and we would be ready soon. About 7:45 a.m., we heard alot of banging going on outside near the jet engines by the rear of the plane. We heard clanking and some beat up engine sound. Five minutes later, we hear the same thing again, all while the car horn is still blaring. At about 7:55 a.m., the captain announces that this machine which is like a vacuum hose and is used to start the engines is broken. He said a new guy did not put it on right and it flew off. The second time he tried, it broke off and can no longer be used. He said this was an outsourced crew that did this. He said that they were calling around to get another one. He said looking out of his window was like looking at the keystone cops with everyone running around all over the place. Meanwhile, the stupid horn is still blaring and the plane is hot and dark. People are starting to panic. Luckily, calmness reigns or maybe it was sleep. Most had somehow started to doze off. Not me....that horn sound is still driving me crazy. Finally at 8:15 a.m., we leave Cleveland. We are only 1 hour and 15 minutes behind schedule.

Arrival to Minneapolis was not joyous. Our delay caused us to miss our connecting flight to Too Cold. They rebooked us on the 1 p.m. flight out and gave us discount coupons for our next flight. Fine! We decided to head to a foodcourt and eat breakfast. We had 3 1/2 hours to burn somehow. We settled on brunch at various restaurants in the foodcourt. After eating and resting a few, we heading to our new terminal. We figured we could crash there since it was only 10:30 in the morning. We found it quickly. My son and I decided to catch a few zzz's as my daughter sat and read her magazines. We were up at 12:30 p.m. to get water before they began boarding instructions. We watched at the pilots went on board and waited to be called. At 12:45 p.m., the captain came out and spoke with the woman at the counter. She annouced that there was a mechanical problem and it would take 30 minutes to fix. She said the flight was delayed until 1:30 p.m. as many people groaned. A few minutes later the other pilot came out and sat down with the captain in the waiting area. At 1:oo p.m., the mechanic comes out and speaks to the pilots and the woman at the counter. She makes another announcement. The mechanical issue is worse than thought and would not be fixed for over an hour or more. People are getting upset. A few minutes later she anounces that we are being transferred to a new plane at another gate on another concourse. Everyone picks up their stuff and starts walking. Upon our arrival to our new gate, we learn that we are scheduled to leave at 1:35 p.m. for Too Cold. I am feeling grouchy and tired. I just want to go home. Take-off was really wobbly. It felt like we were going to crash. I started to say every prayer I could think of. Landing was the same way. It felt like we were out of control, but somehow we made it safely.

The van was still there and it started immediately. We were all happy. After a pitstop for dinner, we headed home. We munched on BBQ ribs, mashed potatoes, veggies and garlic bread. After a few minutes of tv, it was off to bed.

It wasn't smooth or easy, but the van was there and started so we are running 2 out of 4. I guess 50% is better that 25% anyday.

Thanks for all the warm wishes.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Another Year - Version 2007

2007-01-02T00:19:00.000-05:00

I hope all of you in bloggerland had a happy time. I spent mine at home with family. It was cool. No shebang, but then there's always next year. I decided to check out my 2007 forecast on one of those horoscope sites. I got some pretty good news. It seems like I will be moving away from Too Cold this year. I already knew that because I already have been apartment hunting. I will be getting a raise in early fall. That is wonderful since I most likely will be starting a new job in June. A raise in September will mean I am doing great. And finally, I will make some permanent changes to my health and fitness lifestyle. That's my favorite one. I need to prepare for my new life in Buckeye land, plus the swimsuit season countdown has begun. Time to overhaul my diet and exercise routine. Overall, it said my 2007 would be a very good year, but that is was only a preparation year for the great year I will have in 2008. Sounds good to me. Hopefully, the stars are right.

If you would like to check your free 2007 yearly horoscope click here!

Tomorrow, we make the big journey to Minnesota. Hopefully, everything will be smooth and easy. I pray that the van is right where we left it and it actually starts. I'll update you and let you know how many out of the four we hit. Until then....

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Christmas Journey

2006-12-30T03:12:00.000-05:00

I was sharing my travel story with a fellow blogger when I realized maybe I should share the whole story. So, here it is....

I decided to fly with rugratz to my mother's for the holidays. After much haggling with various sources, I found a way to get decent priced tickets. Last year, the best I could do was $1500 for the three of us, so we stayed home. This year, with the help from ebay and Northwest offering some cheaper fares, I was able to halve my previous sticker shock. What was also cool was the fact that this would be the first plane ride for the rugratz. They were definitely excited.

The day before the trip, I made a pitstop at our local airport. It is small with one terminal. Next year, I heard they are adding a second one. Anyways, small town, small terminal. Should be no problem, right? Wrong. They take their job seriously and are on the ball when it comes to safety. You can ask my best friend, Kel. This year, they wouldn't let her on the plane for her flight. They felt she was dressed too flashy. It was off to be interviewed and searched for her. We ended up getting a few extra hours together as she waited for the next flight. Thank goodness we have five outbound flights a day. Til this day, Kel does not want to ever go near my local airport.

My pitstop was to ask a few questions. I know they had made so many changes to the former rules for flying. I wanted to know what they were. I had presents to bring, electrical equipment (Nintendo Wii and Playstation 2) to transport, and I needed to know if I could park my van there. The woman was helpful. She told me not to wrap any gifts since airport security would just unwrap them and place them back in my suitcase unwrapped. She said I could use my carry-on bag for my electrical equipment and park my van in the lot. It seems everything was set.

Things atarted to go wrong later that day. At first, it was little things like lazy kids or missing shoes. The next day, it was missing tickets and and fighting siblings. We got to the airport just in time to check in and have our tickets reprinted. I felt frustrated with being so hurried after trying to prepare for two weeks. I medicated me and one of the rugratz with motion sickness meds as we waited. I started to feel nauseated when I realized two bags of presents were sitting back at my house. Oh well. I drank my water and hoped the flight attendent would never find out that I ate a double cheeseburger for lunch.

I was excited to go through security with the rugratz. I tried to prepare them for what would happen and what they should do. I went first as a role model and I was quickly pulled aside. The kids didn't understand. Neither did I at the moment. Three security people wanted to know why I had a small lightbulb in the pocket of my coat. I was puzzled until I reached in and felt it. Security was panicking. I informed them I did not have a lightbulb, just a homemade snowman ornament that was given to me earlier by a friend. I forgot it was in my pocket since I hadn't put my coat on and had only been carrying it. They looked at it and informed me it was made with a lightbulb. I didn't know. They handed it back and I thought that was it. Nope, definitely not it.

As I was holding up the line, my kids cleared security. I kept telling them to go sit down, but my son did not want to leave my side. I looked at him and reminded him to listen as another security agent pulled me and my carry-on bag and purse to another area. I asked her to be discreet since she was inspecting a bag with my kids' presents. Thank goodness she tried. I stood there as she unpacked everything wondering if I would ever reach the airplane. That's when I saw her angry face as she held two things in the air. They were my son's cologne and my daughter's nail polish. I forgot that they were in that bag. Packing was so secretive and rushed that my mind forgot to make a mental note. That's when she began the speech. I did not declare these items so them will have to throw them away since I can not have them. I should have know better and etc.... I looked at her in horror. Those were Christmas gifts for the rugratz. I didn't even wrap them yet. I begged her to please let me put them in my luggage. After a few more terse looks, she agreed to do it for me. I described my luggage and she was off. I was free to join the kids again. I was happy to be one of the ten passengers flying that day. (I told you it was a small airport!)

The flight was nice since the weather was beautiful. We arrived a half hour early. As we walked to our connection, we hoped that the rest of our journey would be so smooth. We boarded our plane to Cleveland with much excitement, but with a feeling that bedtime was near. This was a big jet plane, not a little propeller plane like before. The rugratz quickly got cozy as we waited to roll over to the runway for take off. The captain said that at this rate we would be about 30 minutes early. I thought that was cool, since I had presents to wrap still. Boy, was our pilot wrong about being early. It seems that another jet parked itself behind our plane and we could not back up to move towards the runway. We ended up stuck there for some time and ended up being 15 minutes late into Cleveland. Still, it was a smooth flight and the rugratz had a good time. And.....the Dramamine worked. No one got sick!

After arriving to my mom's at 12:15 AM on Christmas morning, I spent 4 hours wrapping like a mad Christmas elf after I had a quick nap. It was much appreciated several hours later. Christmas was fun and the family and rugratz were happy. So was I.

Hope everyone had a merry Christmas and for those of you who are traveling....safe journeys.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

A Buckeye Xmas

2006-12-29T02:42:00.000-05:00

Well, I did it. I found my way here to Buckeye land for the holidays. It seems to have made many people happy. I guess I am happy to be of such a service. It wasn't but 15 minutes after arriving at Cleveland's "International" Airport that the phone began ringing. Somehow, my friends were already sensing my presence. Damn, they are good.

Here's my motto during my vacation....

It is nice to be back and visit. Although this is short and sweet, it is the nice recharging experience I need. If you haven't the clue, I have been MIA for awhile. It seems I can only juggle so much and something had to give. Too bad I was the fool and chose the internet. I really missed writing. I enjoy being creative and remembering stories I was told or experienced. Life is interesting and sometimes it is fun to share.

I also missed my blogging friends. I enjoy the stories of your lives. Drama from a distance or even the mudane is fun. Those of you I have read before will see new comments from me soon. Plus, I have new pictures of things in my life from the past two months.

Things I have done recently......

****Started a penny drive at my school which raised almost $400 in 14 days. The students surpassed my expectations. The money will go to a campaign to end child abuse which was chosen by the students.

****Became the chairperson of Indian Education Parent Committee. Reviewing course mapping and seeing if the school meets the committee's expectations is not exciting, but maybe positive changes will occur.

****My baby girl had her first formal dance which I chaperoned. She put a dent in my Christmas budget, but I think I will remember how beautiful she was dancing for the rest of my life.

****Made some cool ceramic pieces. Who knew I could work clay like that? It seems my artistic side is stronger than I thought. I was able to gift some pretty pieces to a lucky few. If you'd like a special something, let me know. I have a few things I haven't parted with yet.

****I recovered from my second degree burns from Thanksgiving. I got details and pictures coming later.

****I reconnected with some old friends. It seems this time of year is for reconnecting. I am happy to give some shout-outs to Misty, Janie, Violet, JoLynn, Marcus, Karen, Fred, Mark, Rob, Judy, and the others. I predict a face 2 face is in the near future if it hasn't happened yet.

****I am experiencing a second bunny in heat. Once again, it has become time to take my little guy to the vet. Baby has done well since being neutured. I hope Baby Baby will experience the same results.

That's it for now. It was nice.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Free At Last

2006-11-09T03:12:00.000-05:00

I love when people open their eyes. It makes me happy when any person makes a decision to improve their lives and the lives of their children. He said we were wrong about him. Now, everyone will see his integrity and true motives. For today, we celebrate. Not for the ending, but for the new beginning.

Rosie O'Donnell is my homegirl! I share her joy!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

ICUP

2006-11-02T02:33:00.001-05:00

Do you remember that joke from long ago where you would ask someone to spell I-Cup? They would say I-C-U-P and then everyone would laugh. Remember? Well, ICUP had a different meaning to me altogether and had nothing to do with peeing.

His name was I. C. He was a year older than me. He was cute, quiet and had a smile that could light up a room. He was a member of the cool clique in his grade and the best friend of "Pour some sugar on me".

My best friend from high school and I use to call that clique the Winning Crew or W.C. for short. Several of the guys had ego problems so by calling them W.C., we were being very sarcastic. A few of the guys thought it was a compliment and called themselves that which made us laugh secretly. I remember W.C. finding it's place on many desks that year.

Another thing that popped up that year was "I love ICUP". It was a code name to declare my love secretly. He was dating a blond and then a redhead so I tried to keep my desire quiet. Boy, was that hard! He sat right next to me in spanish. I was so focused on him that I never realized the guy on the other side of me had a big crush. Poor J., I heard him say it, but I just never believed it, especially with I. C. sitting next to me. Eventually, I. C. and I had our moments, but then he left for Atlanta and said he probably would stay there. I was devastated.

Although he did come back, it was never the same. But for some reason, he pops into my life when I need a little encouragement.

One night back then, my mom was flipping out on me. It was drug issues and I tried to avoid her. That day, I went home with my best friend from high school, Meliss. My mother was acting highly agitated and started to accuse me and my best friend of stealing her boyfriend's cocaine. I was outraged. I was never into drugs or even getting high. It just wasn't my thing after growing up around users and abusers.

We all got into the car so she could take us to pick up my friend, Sissy, and drop us off at the roller skating rink. When we drove past Sissy's house, I reminded my mom where she lived. This made her sour mood worse. She began hitting me as she was driving as Meliss was freaking out in the backseat. I ended up jumping out of the moving car to avoid being hit. My mom never hit the brakes or came back to see if I was ok. So, I got up and walked to my Godmother's house.

Ever see a really angry black woman? Well, that is the face my Godmother had after hearing my story. She wanted to jump my mom, but she was a Christian woman and said she would pray for her.

It was after that moment that Josh pulled me outside. Josh....the boy I was crushing after......the eventual second love of my life. He told me that he remembers the time when his mom was acting crazy from doing drugs. He was sweet and supportive. Soon, Meliss and Sissy showed up. They still wanted to go to the skating rink. Next, M.C. showed up to join our group with Josh. Now, M.C. has always been a good friend of mine. He was Josh's best friend and I. C.'s brother. Well, we went to the skating rink and I tried to have fun, but I was feeling stressed. Josh's flirting helped until we got back to my Godmother's house. My mother had sent word out that I better be home by midnight or she was calling the police. I was dumbfounded by the request since I had been living at my Godmother's house. I didn't want to go home. I was scared, so scared. I only wanted one thing. I wanted to talk to I.C. and see his smiling face.

I never knew he could look so serious. He was so supportive and calming. He helped me clear my head and think straight. I remember hugging him goodbye.

I walked to Meliss's house and picked up her and Sissy. Lucky for me, my mom had to work the midnight shift. We began the journey to my house and cut through Burger King's parking lot. There in a car at the drive-thru were two of our guy friends. We invited them over. That night, I went to sleep and my best friend got pregnant. I still don't know what Sissy did for sure, but I know I dreamed of I.C. and his big smile.

That isn't the only time he has helped me or encouraged me. We talked after his brother D. died. I was facing the divorce and was overwhelmed. There he was....sweet and supportive as ever. I guess the only sad part of it is that he comes into my life and then quickly disappears again. I don't like that at all. I just wish we could stay in touch.

Tonight, I may have gotten my wish. I got an email from him. Too bad he sent it months ago. Maybe I should check the site more often. lol! Here's what it said:

how are you? always thinking about you!

Wow! It feels great to be remembered. What's funny is that I just wrote on my cousin's husband's myspace quiz that....

7. Tell me one odd/intresting fact about you: I've been easily forgotten by many people.

Guess I was wrong. My bad.

Anyways, in the end, I guess ICUP is still pretty special to me after all this time. And by the way, I still have his hat. My son wears it.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Halloween Love

2006-10-31T07:32:00.000-05:00

I hope all of you out there have a wonderful day and a scream-filled night. Life is good, especially with chocolate candy. Mmmmmmm! And what's even better???? Free chocolate candy! Mmmmmmm mmmmmmm!

Anyways, I'd like to remember two guys who made Halloween more rememberable....

Grandpa....thank you for the love, the fishing trips and the orange and brown bike. I didn't appreciate how much Cleveland Rocks until I was older, but you began the Browns Backer legacy back in the day. I hope your journey and departure will inspire others to stop smoking or never start. To have you fade away with such pain was hard, but at least there was bliss at the end of the tunnel. Love you.

Benji....what more can I say....yo te amo.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

It's Been

2006-10-29T21:54:00.000-05:00

Hello everyone.

I'm been gone awhile. I've been busy with life. I've got so many new things going. Here's the update.....

The job is going good. I love working with kids. I hope when they move on with their lives, that they remember some of the conversations we have had. There are some really great kids out there that need the support of their communities. I hope I can continue to do that no matter where I am.

Volunteer work......I'm doing alot of it with my job. I got the kids involved with raising money for breast cancer this month by collecting pink Yoplait lids in our community. Hopefully, our small contribution will make a difference in someone's life.

I am also working on a Hunger Banquet. I am teaching a class on hunger, homelessness and poverty in November. My students will be hosting the dinner. My personal goal is to raise $1,000, but more importantly, I hope to have a lasting effect on the attendees and especially the students.

I have been dealing with on ongoing problem. Most of my friends live far from me or have left the area and moved on. The few that are left have been busy with their own lives. Thank goodness Kel is still there even though she is 1,000 miles away. What would I do if I didn't have my best friend there??? I don't even want to think about it. Anyways, I have been gone from Buckeye Land for 8 years. I had good reason then, but now, I don't. So, unless a major life altering experience happens that keeps me in Too Cold, I'll be traveling back to the State of the Almighty Cedar Point for an extended stay. My family and friend seem pretty happy about that too. So, the next seven months will direct my future life in more than one way. No matter where I end up or what happens next, all I hope for is that me and the rugratz are safe and smiling.

Thank you to all who have visited my site in my absence. Your concern, comments and presence is deeply appreciated. May I continue to blog until my computer dies....lol!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Not Me? Couldn't Be!

2006-09-14T21:32:00.000-04:00

Work today was busy. It is the second week of school. Routines are starting to fall into place. All of the faces and names are beginning to become a part of my permanent memory.

Today was the first time our head of the school was not there. You could tell. Boundaries were tested and re-enforced. It seems that teen girls are less dramatic than boys. We will see as the year goes on.

I was tired going in, but even more tired coming out. I was thankful for 4 o'clock and jumped in my ride to head home. After two quick pitstops, I realized that today was Thursday. Oh no. The rabbit needs a pick up. My son joined soccer at his school and would need a ride home. No biggie. Off I went....

He was there exactly at the right time. He hopped in and away we went. I was thinking about what I would do first when I entered my abode. Would I lounge, make dinner or crash??? Then I heard "Look mom! It's Hanky." Sure enough, in a minivan next to us was Hanky and his mom. We are all friends so we waved back to them and then the red light turned green and away we went.

I commented to my son that my friend was a soccor mom. She was always running around with her kids taking then to hockey or whatever sport they were in. Definitely a soccor mom there.

Then my son said it....."But you are a soccer mom too.."
"What?" was all I could say. Me???? You have got to be kidding.

There was a pause. We were at the next red light. My son clearly pointed out that I drive the minivan, am an active parent in his life and that I had just picked him up from soccer practice. Yep, he was right about those things.

"Well, at least you won't have to worry about me putting one of those 'I'm a proud parent of an honor roll student' bumperstickers on the back. No need to lower the value of the minivan than it already is." Then, the light turned green and off we went.

Within 15 minutes, I was snuggled in my jammies on the couch eating cereal with my kids. How divine.

Since I have no worries of the title, I did decide to wikipedia it up......just in case you don't know what on earth I am talking about....

Soccer mom
In North American social, cultural and political discourse, soccer mom (and less used soccer dad for the male equivalent) refers broadly to a demographic group of women with school-age children. In general, the term "soccer mom" refers to the concept of American post-feminist motherhood as an amalgam of traditional domestic values with modern feminism (1960s-1980s), and is associated with modern material conveniences such as the SUV and cell phone. A soccer mom is typically imagined as upper middle class, probably college-educated, most often suburban or exurban, and typically white. The "soccer mom" typically indicates a single income family, where the husband works while the wife is a homemaker. Since the 1980s, two incomes are widely considered to be "requirement" of the typical working class family in the U.S., and in this context single incomes symbolize both affluence and a disconnect from the working and lower middle classes. The term can carry pejorative connotations, where the soccer mom may denote a woman who is aloof and has little responsibility or occupation, other than providing basic transportation for her children. In feminist circles, the soccer mom may refer to a woman who has given up on a promising and successful career, particularly after having some early aspirations and achievements. In this context this may carry the meaning of someone of diminished individual character. However, the word is not entirely negative, those described as soccer moms sometimes take pride in the term as affirmation that they are dedicated to providing attention, recreation and positive social contact for their children.

Defining the soccer mom

The term is thought to have been coined by a woman running for city council in Denver, Colorado. When asked for her credentials, she replied: "soccer mom." It came into widespread use in the 1990s, notably during the 1992 U.S. presidential election and 1996 presidential campaigns and since.

Literally, soccer moms drive their children to play soccer. At once, the soccer mom is associated with encouraging, if perhaps overscheduling, their children with activities, and with making personal sacrifices for their children's benefit (taking them to play), while perhaps remaining somewhat overprotective.

The term has found a life as shorthand for a stereotype, or set of stereotypes, far beyond its literal meaning.

Most widely, perhaps, they are associated with driving Volvos, minivans, or SUVs. Active pride in their children may be displayed, for instance, with membership in a Parent-Teacher Association, or with a bumper sticker boasting that her child is an honors student at their school. They may also have drinks and snacks in the car, for when the children finish school and/or soccer.

As you would see if you truly knew me that "that" could never be the real me......but it is a little close, but no cigar!

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

My Inspiration

2006-09-12T00:20:00.000-04:00

I can hear that Chicago song in my head now....."you're the meaning in my life, you're my inspiration..." I loved that song back in the 80's. It still stirs up the warm fuzzies in me. It also reminds me how important it is to not only inspire others, but to have that inspiration in your own life. I guess it goes back to self-care, which at times I lack as a single mother. Not today though. Today is a time to reflect, recharge and inspire. I looked back in my archives and found something perfect. I wrote this on my blog long ago, but I thought today would be appropriate to repeat it. I think we could all use a little inspiration in our lives.

Saturday, March 01, 2003

Every so often, people need inspiration in their lives to keep them moving on. Inspiration comes in all forms too. For me today, it was a presentation I saw on a website. I have been to other presentations on the sister sites. I have enjoyed them all. But for all the things going on in the world, this one was pretty perfect for today. Please take the time and view this presentation. It is short and just amazing to watch.

Click here for the presentation!

If you would like to view the another presentation, click here!

I hope you are inspired too.

Stay sweet 'n smile............................Mz.

Tag Me. No, Tag You!

2006-09-07T22:15:00.000-04:00

I got tagged! Thanks Mon. It is a word association. Here are my answers.

1. Auto.....pilot
2. Spy......wear
3. Wind....hair
4. Loud.....tv
5. Sexy.....back (Damn that Justin Timberlake!)

Finally.....now to tag others. It is the fun part of all this.

The following five people are officially tagged:

Nea, Betty, Jess, Amber and Johnny.

Here are the 5 words for these bloggers....

1. Light
2. Dog
3. Rusty
4. Success
5. Flowers

Much love to you all!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

I’ll Show You Mine

2006-09-05T20:00:00.000-04:00

This comes from Jess at O Mama Mia! She wants to know about our toys.......

"Ok, I’m pretty sure that this will be one that anyone can play. Are you ready? You know you wanna….

Show Me Your TOYS! Just because we’re grown-up doesn’t mean we can’t have toys of our own. Are you a go-go gadget girl? Do you three-wheel your weekends away? Are you a shopping junkie & have something new to show off? Are you a scrappin’ crafty chic? What about playdates? Do you have a great friend that you enjoy playtime with? Show Me! Let your inner child shine! Play on!"

I’ll Show You Mine….

Lately, I've been loving my bongos. I love Donkey Konga on my Gamecube, but only until my hands get sore.

Now You Show Me Yours!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Crikey Steve Irwin!

2006-09-04T02:03:00.000-04:00

"I have no fear of losing my life - if I have to save a koala or a crocodile or a kangaroo or a snake, mate, I will save it. "

-Steve Irwin
I just learned that Steven Irwin passed on. He was killed by a stingray while filming an underwater documentary by the Low Isles Reef near the resort town of Port Douglas. As many of his fans and supporters know, he leaves behind not only his legacy at the Australia Zoo, but his wife, Terri and their children, 8 year old Bindi Sue and 2 year old Bob.

I loved watching "The Crocodile Hunter" on Animal Planet. I believe it was his easy-going personality and the passion he showed toward the animals. Although he looked at every animal with enthusiasm and childlike fascination, he spoke with knowledge and respect. I connected with him even if through the television. I loved his passion for the animals, especially his beloved crocs. Steve inspired me to watch and learn more about animals. Eventually, his passion reflected in my own passion.

I remember when Terri joined Steve. He looked as if his life was complete. He had his crocodiles, his zoo and now his wife, but that changed as Bindi Sue came. And then eventually, with Bob's arrival, you would think Steve would finally settle down. But not the Crocodile Hunter. There were still animals to care for, causes to be supported and animal education needed to be spread. And that was what Steve Irwin did. He lived his life the way he believed he needed to. He wore what he wanted to wear and spoke how he felt. Steve was who he was. Although he died in the process of living life the way he wanted, most likely, Steve would have it no other way.

I send my deepest condolences to the Irwin family and the Australia Zoo staff. Steve will always be a part of us and may he memory live on to inspire another generation to love crocodiles like he did.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Workout in Dreamland

2006-09-03T13:37:00.000-04:00

I woke up today in pain. I am not sure as to why my body aches like I had the workout of my life yesterday....

Yesterday was fun. I called one of my really good friends, Shanbob, the day before. I haven't talked to her all summer. She assumed that I made my annual summer journey to Ohio. This year, she was wrong. I was actually here all summer. It has been a summer of doctor visits and trying to get better. I'm still not "better", but I think I am faced in that direction now. My personal goal is to reach my birthday (April 18th) and feel normal again. I miss that feeling of just feeling like the average me in my skin. The normal feeling left last March/April and hasn't returned yet. I'm still hopeful. Anyways, I only saw Too Cold, Minnesota this summer.

Well, Shanbob was happy to hear from me and actually heading to Too Cold on her way to see her husband. It turns out that she needed help from me and the rugratz. Shanbob's husband is running in a local election and was participating in a parade north of here. She wanted me to ride in the truck with her so we could talk and let the rugratz throw candy to the kids watching the parade. Her hubby and friends would walk behind us greeting people and passing out flyers. Well, it all turned out as planned and everyone had fun. The rugratz enjoyed being in their first parade.

The rest of the day was spent back in Too Cold shopping. The rugratz start school Tuesday and we had to finish our school shopping. I am a bargain hunter and managed to find seven tops for $26. Baby girl got three top and two sweaters. Baby boy got a Starter jersey and a Tommy polo shirt. I guess you have to be at the right place and time for this to happen. Yesterday was my day. Other than the shopping, I did limited physical activity. I came home tired and headed to bed. When I went to sleep, I was not achey at all.

As I was starting to awake, yet still in dreamland, I saw a hand place a letter on my chest. I was in the laying down position still. I got up and opened it. It was four pieces of notebook paper with writing on them. The first page said for me to finish my homework. The second said to take care of myself and get healthy. The third paper said to live life and have fun. That's when I realized it was my deceased grandmother's handwriting on the paper. I got up to look to see her and turned to the fourth page and I couldn't read it because it was fading. Then, I woke up. And then, the pain hit me.

Maybe, I worked out in my sleep. It sure feels like it. Maybe it is just the weather cooling down and the bones getting older. Maybe I slept in some strange positions that was not good for the alignment. Anyways, I know I have things to to. I am happy to have connected with my grandmother if just for a few minutes, I understand her purpose. Grandma's reminders were just what I needed....guidance from a loved one and then a trip to the bathroom for a few motrin for pain.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Brain Gender

2006-09-02T23:48:00.000-04:00

MzAriez's Brain is
47% Female, 53% Male

Your brain is a healthy mix of male and female
You are both sensitive and savvy
Rational and reasonable, you tend to keep level headed
But you also tend to wear your heart on your sleeve

What Gender Is Your Brain?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

New Job, Big Jeans

2006-08-31T07:46:00.000-04:00

Well, I 've been working the new job all this week. We have been moving classrooms upstairs and downstairs and rearranging them. I've got alot done, including some organization for various staff. But I must admit, I can feel every muscle in my body. That is ok with me because the jeans are now sagging.

We had our orientation/open house last night. I was able to meet some new students and some former students. It was a laid back affair which was perfect for me. I had a red face for most of the day and was sweating alot. By the time the open house was in full mode, I had cooled down a bit.

My daughter was also able to get her new schedule. She is really happy with it. I'm glad. Her best friend is in three out of five classes with her. Both girls were happy and full of giggles last night.

Overall, I am happy about it. It seems like a good fit for both of us. And if the jeans keep sagging, it looks like it will be time to go shopping which is never a bad thing. Plus, Kel, my BFOE and personal stylist, will be happy to see me in some new clothes. She abhors big jeans and taught me that I was buying two sizes too big. I guess in the end, everyone will be happy.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

My Celebrity Twin

2006-08-30T01:47:00.000-04:00

This is too funny. I look nothing like Denise Richards. Although I did think Charlie Sheen was cute for a minute. LOL!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

First Crush

2006-08-30T00:56:00.000-04:00

My first crush happened in Mrs. Barrickman's first grade class. His name was Derek and I thought he was so cute. I sat next to him and just quietly admired him. I was teacher's pet and when I was asked to chose other students to help in another classroom, I chose him. He was always nice to me in the classroom and out on the playground. I just didn't know what to do except to crush on him silently.

It is amazing how one day with one small difference can change everything. His small difference was warts. He came to school one Monday bragging about playing outside and catching frogs, fish and worms. He said the coolest part was his souvenir. Then, he showed us his hands. There they were.....fresh warts. He had three on the hand next to me and others on his left on. I felt so sick looking at them. He still had the dirt under his nails and around his cuticle. That's when I realized that I like a guy with decent hands.....no warts please. That day my crush ended.

Derek always remained cute to me, but as we got older, we ended up in different circles. After graduation, I never saw him again. You know, life moves on like that.

As I reflect today, I wonder if he still enjoys playing in the dirt. I hope he does even if he gets more warts.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

The Big Day

2006-08-28T00:31:00.000-04:00

I am willing to finally admit it. Summer is over. At least it is over for me. The new job starts tomorrow and life as I know it is changing.

I look forward to tomorrow because I am excited about my job. I still get to work with high school students with special needs like I did last year. The change this year is that I will be doing it from an educational perspective versus the mental health perspective approach I had last year. Also, this job has many oppportunities to explore other areas. It is probably due to the fact that it is a small progressive school. I like that.

The next couple days will be orientation and preparation. We meet the students and their parents on Wednesday. Finally, next week, school will start. That means my daughter and I can drive to school together. I am invading her territory. At least, she is happy about this. I guess that is a clue that we have a healthy positive relationship. I pray we keep it this way.

Well, wish me luck.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

The Drunk Game

2006-08-26T01:03:00.000-04:00

I am not a big drinker. I've had my fair share of toilet time and dancing like a fool. I perfer to do other things in my free time since I've gotten older. But, on certain nights out with my BFOE, we have a few and laugh until breakfast. I am more of a "babysitter" drinker. I get a drink and will drink it slooowwwwly over a couple hours. Plus, I always have a designated driver because I am no fool.

I have a really bad story about me, my shirt, Kel's bathroom, and my desire to keep it clean after a really bad overdose of Goldschlager Cinnamon Schnapps and Vodka. But, I'll let your imagination fill in the rest of that story.

Anyways, now, I am usually the designated driver. I don't mind, just don't puke in my car. That smell sucks to get rid of. Ever had to help out a friend that has had too much too drink? Well, it is time to help him out again....

Well, I found this cute game you can play and help your friend who has had a few too many.

Click here to try.

My best was 81 meters.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Hip-Hip-Hurray!

2006-08-25T13:12:00.001-04:00

Last night, I attended a school board meeting. It was my first since I was a teen. It was for a local charter school that my daughter will be attending this fall. It's a really cool school where the teachers are motivated and interesting. The director is open-minded and committed, plus a friend of mine. The school is based on the Expeditionary Learning Schools Outward Bound (ELS) K-12 educational design. That approach combines rigorous academic content and real world projects -- learning expeditions -- with active teaching and community service. It has 10 design principles that include:

The Primacy of Self-Discovery
Learning happens best with emotion, challenge and the requisite support. People discover their abilities, values, passions, and responsibilities in situations that offer adventure and the unexpected. In Expeditionary Learning schools, students undertake tasks that require perseverance, fitness, craftsmanship, imagination, self-discipline, and significant achievement. A teacher's primary task is to help students overcome their fears and discover they can do more than they think they can.

The Having of Wonderful Ideas
Teaching in Expeditionary Learning schools fosters curiosity about the world by creating learning situations that provide something important to think about, time to experiment, and time to make sense of what is observed.

The Responsibility for Learning
Learning is both a personal process of discovery and a social activity. Everyone learns both individually and as part of a group. Every aspect of an Expeditionary Learning school encourages both children and adults to become increasingly responsible for directing their own personal and collective learning.

Empathy and Caring
Learning is fostered best in communities where students' and teachers' ideas are respected and where there is mutual trust. Learning groups are small in Expeditionary Learning schools, with a caring adult looking after the progress and acting as an advocate for each child. Older students mentor younger ones, and students feel physically and emotionally safe.

Success and Failure
All students need to be successful if they are to build the confidence and capacity to take risks and meet increasingly difficult challenges. But it is also important for students to learn from their failures, to persevere when things are hard, and to learn to turn disabilities into opportunities.

Collaboration and Competition
Individual development and group development are integrated so that the value of friendship, trust, and group action is clear. Students are encouraged to compete not against each other, but with their own personal best and with rigorous standards of excellence.

Diversity and Inclusion
Both diversity and inclusion increase the richness of ideas, creative power, problem-solving ability, and respect for others. In Expeditionary Learning schools, students investigate and value their different histories and talents as well as those of other communities and cultures. Schools and learning groups are heterogeneous.

The Natural World
A direct and respectful relationship with the natural world refreshes the human spirit and teaches the important ideas of recurring cycles and cause and effect. Students learn to become stewards of the earth and of future generations.

Solitude and Reflection
Students and teachers need time alone to explore their own thoughts, make their own connections, and create their own ideas. They also need time to exchange their reflections with other students and with adults.

Service and Compassion
We are crew, not passengers. Students and teachers are strengthened by acts of consequential service to others, and one of an Expeditionary Learning school's primary functions is to prepare students with the attitudes and skills to learn from and be of service.

Another thing I like about the school is that is requires students to complete 80 hours of community service and travel at least once to a foreign country. Here's some of the things last year's senior class did:

Organized and Ran first Hunger Banquet
Traveled internationally to Italy, Kazakhstan, Belize, and Canada
Canoed through the Boundary Waters
Climbed and camped in Ely
Presented at National Food Prize in Iowa
Attended CNA Training in Wisconsin
Experienced Niagara Falls, the Grand Canyon, NYC, Washington DC, Red Rocks, Las Vegas, Minneapolis Murals and the Indiana Sand Dunes
Traveled to the Renaissance Festival and on a College Tour of Minnesota
Maintained academic excellence

My daughter is very happy about the opportunities she will have at this school and so am I. She was even more excited when her best friend told her she got accepted into the school too. Now, they can be happy together.

BTW, I am happy for other reasons too. Last night at that 3 hour metting, I was hired to work at the school. So, now I am finally employed again. I guess summer is really coming to an end after all.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Maternal Urges

2006-08-25T00:46:00.000-04:00

I believed I learned this one from my mom. I don't know where she learned it from. Maybe for her, it was just instinct. Somehow, this maternal pattern is appearing in my family. Let's backtrack a little.

After I was born and so many years of not finding the man of her dreams, my mom decided for now in her life, I would be an only child. Although she held tight to this belief, she kept having an urge to have another child. I guess Mother Nature and her body had other ideas and kept urging her forward. She fought back though and won temporarily by taking in my grandma's black cat, Dixie.

I loved Dixie. She was a year younger than me and quite the proper lady cat. Although she wasn't that fun since she growled and hissed all the time, I still enjoyed playing with her.

I guess my mom got that urge again when I was seven years old. That was year that we got Trixie. She was an ugly cross-eyed Siamese kitten that my mom bought from a local farming family. I was so delighted. I think Dixie was too. I had a new playmate and Dixie figured she could retire to the tranquility of my mother's room. Sorry, no deal there Dixie. Trixie was a runt and still needed a mom. For whatever personal reason she had, Dixie fixed her own materal urge with the Siamese kitten. Trixie got a mom and I got two furry friends to play dolls with.

After about six years, my mom got the urge again. That's when Pixie entered our family. This gray-striped tabby was not very bright, but she gave my mom much joy. She was a hopper since I raised her with my bunny, Pepsi. She was spooked of everything which made playing with her interesting. Although Pixie never joined the Trixie/Dixie clique, she surrvived as "Mom's favorite" kitty.

A couple years later, the urge struck mom again. This time it was a black kitten with a few select white spots. Spooky began the trend of a new name line and new cat personality issues. She was the baby of the basement. That was her domain. She liked her alone time and large amount of personal space. She always had a runny nose and several allergy issues. Somehow, this loner was placed in Pixie's friend box. Poor Pix, her only kitty friend didn't want to be near her.

Well, things changed. Mom's urges took a break. Dix and Trix and Pix and eventually the Spook got their first class ticket to kitty heaven. During the end of this cycle, mom had a few flashbacks and Princess and Patches were added to the family. Now, you would think it stops there, but it doesn't. My mom has way more hormonal surges than that. This is when she commited a major crime. A crime that rips our family away everyday....

She catnapped our Moo.

It was only suppose to be a temporary visit. In my family, cats get to visit other relatives houses. That's our family norm. No big deal, until the norm was broken with theft. She refuses to give him back. My poor fat guy is hostage to the grandma who won't let go. I think she had another one of those urges again and Moo sated that desire. Too bad, he was mine first.

I wanted another child for years. I think after my two kids entered elementary school, it hit me. I wanted a baby. I was busy raising the two and trying to work my way through school. There was no space for a baby. Plus, there was no prospects for a quality partner and father in my limited vicinity. So, I bought fish, because I live in an apartment.

Over the years, I have bought lots of fish. Sometimes my babies would like to eat each other, but it was never felt satisfying with each new purchase. It's hard to hug a three inch fish. I changed that when I moved and got Meeko da Moo Cat. I finally felt satisfaction to that urge. He became such a wonderful member of our family. We were all so happy....that is until the catnapping.

I think one of her urges took over her mind because at times, my mother can be rather reasonable. She has lost that regarding the Moo. She refuses to return him and wants us to wait until she is dead. Although it tears my heart, I am respecting her wishes. She should thank her mother for that. My grandma taught me to be respectful even in painful situations. One day, Moo will find his way home. At, least we will visit him at Christmas.

In the mean time, another urge hit her house. Her name is Penny and she is sweet. I think this will be my mom's last urge, but who knows.

As for me, I have another urge too. This time, there will be no visiting my mother and we will return to the "Ixie" names of before. I still am attached to the Siamese look, but this time I want a Ragdoll. I'm hoping by spring I will be able to make the announcement of her arrival. I am so excited. As you can see above, she'll be one pretty kitty.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

So Fresh, So Clean

2006-08-23T01:13:00.000-04:00

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Feeling Moody?

2006-08-23T00:55:00.000-04:00

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Hello again. It's me!

2006-08-21T13:01:00.000-04:00

Long time no write. I hope I wasn't forgotten. Time to change that. Maybe I should let you know who I am. First, let's just scratch.........

| View

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Personal Me

2006-08-20T23:02:00.000-04:00

My best friend was here for a visit. We were talking about men and dating. She met her man of 8 years online. Wow! We've been online for some time to think of it. Anyways, she suggested I create a online profile like she on some site to meet interesting men. So, I got on the computer and did just that. I created my screen name and password and then I got stuck. It wanted to know who I was and what I was looking for. I never thought that I would ever be at a lost for words, but I was. Who was I and what did I really want. So I sought I would ask my best friend since she knows me better than any other person. An hour later, the following was my creation. Read it and give me your feedback.

I have a great deal of vitality. I am curious, imaginative and resilient and I find pleasure in doing and thinking about all sorts of things and ideas, often at the same time.

I tend to be optimistic, seeing the world as a place of adventure. I seek first-hand experiences. And when I embark on a project or expedition, I like to be organized, thorough and responsible.

I am firmly grounded in reality and live in the here and now. I stand up for my beliefs. And, I have a sympathetic and spiritual side that adds warmth and depth to my being.

In spite of my search for novelty, I have a genuine respect for home, family, work and community. I am conscientious and dependable, yet I occasionally surprise those whom I love with new ideas and tokens of my affection.

I generally enjoy life and have a keen sense of humor. Because I am broad-minded, flexible and playful, I can be a wonderful friend.

I would like to meet someone just as passionate with the willingness to explore and enjoy life. Must like kids, dogs, cats, football, music, movies, pizza, games, traveling, home-cooked meals, family interactions, and the color blue. If you are intelligent, compassionate, can multi-task, compromise, are naturally romantic and love the smell of lavender, you win the door prize.

Well.....?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Look in All Directions

2006-03-11T00:27:00.000-05:00

Here's a reflection I wrote today:

I spent most of my younger childhood with my grandmother. My mother was a single-mom, who worked many hours to provide for us. I enjoyed the times I shared with my grandmother, especially when she told me stories of long ago or how things came to be. The traditional teachings she had learned in her life were being passed down to me unlike my other family members. I did not realize this until I was older that she was giving me a special gift that came with an obligation of responsibility. I was now the carrier of our stories. I knew why her relationship with her brother was the way it was, what the leaders from long ago were expected to do, and why I was taught to embroider. She was preparing me to become a strong Ojibwe woman, like herself. Somewhere in me, she saw potential when I was an infant and began fostering it. She taught me with oral tradition and role modeling to be a good productive member of the community and to pass her gift on to my own children one day.

Reading Ojibwe Waasa Inaabidaa: We Look in All Directions by Thomas Peacock and Marlene Wisun, reminded me of things I learned before. They include the very stories I was taught long ago and the references to historical events I learned in my undergraduate degree. It also reminded me of the pain I suffered as I learned the details of the cruelty that my people faced. It is that very pain I see in the people today as historical trauma continues to thrive in forms of poverty, abuse and corruption.

The late Vine Deloria once wrote and was reprinted in this book that:

Crazy Horse never drafted anyone to follow him. People recognized what Crazy Horse did was for the best and was for the people. Crazy Horse never had his name on stationary. He never had business cards. He never even received a per diem….Until we can produce people like Crazy Horse all the money and help in the world will not save us. It is up to us to write the final chapter of the American Indian on this continent.

I pray that our leaders of today and tomorrow will understand and honor the true role of leadership in order to guide us towards healing and a positive future.

I enjoyed the balance that this book provides for the reader. It contains the good and the bad, the past and the future, the slaughter and the survival. It offers a realistic hope for the continuance of culture that has been repeatedly targeted for assimilation, acculturation and termination. With determination, it will not only survive, but thrive into the next millennium.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

A Foundation Dream

2006-03-03T00:31:00.000-05:00

Here's a reflection I wrote today:

When I was working on my undergraduate degree at Lakeland Community College, I had a dream one night. In this dream, I was inspired to start my own foundation to support non-profit organizations who improved community wellness. The next several months following that dream, I researched non-profit organizations and foundations to determine what roles they played in society and what further support was available to educate me through the creation process. My search brought me to the Council of Non-Profits and the library of information they had available to the public. It was at that point I realized that there was help to making my dream become a reality. I knew it would actually happen one day.

Reading Organizing: A Guide for Grassroots Leaders by Si Kahn and Starting and Running a Non-Profit Organization by Joan Hummel, reminded me of those nights I read about creating my own foundation. I wanted to learn about the framework of non-profit organizations. If I would be serving as a financial resource for them, I needed to know what to look for in a competent organization. Following the description of 20 qualities of a leader in Kahn’s book, I reflected my own qualities and what I would want in an organization I would fund. I would want to know if the group requesting funding has a leader with those qualities to utilize my funding in a positive and successful way. I learned program definition, community need, and agency credibility, as highlighted in Hummel’s book, would also be critical areas of information to review in the grant request process.

My goal for my foundation is to make a positive difference in the world. Choosing organizations with qualities I have learned about in my readings will help move me towards that goal. One day, when the ***** Foundation exists, the slowly dying or fading emotions, memories, ideas, or responses still capable of being revived in a community somewhere, will be revived into a dynamic movement creating a healthier community. That is my dream.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Since I've Been Gone...

2006-02-25T04:22:00.000-05:00

I've been gone awhile. Many things have changed. Or maybe it is just me.

My auntie passed. Finally, she found her way to a painfree place.

My cat, Spookie, left too. She was 20 and on her last life. She is the baby from the basement no more.

Kel, my BFOE, has come and gone. We had so many laughs. I have some strange stories to tell now. I promise not to forget to tell the Truck/Casino/Jacket story sometime.

My son is beautiful and my cherish child, but boy it feels like sometimes he is trying to make me reach for the imaginary emergency phone that you need to break some thin glass to reach. It says "Break if you need back-up."

BREAK!

RING! RING! RING!

Where's my back-up? Hello? I am on the line.....waiting...................still waiting....................waiting...................then I hear it........"Sorry, all back-ups are busy. Please hold and your call will be answered in the order it was received or 5 seconds after you hang up from being on hold for too long."..........and once again still waiting..........well, damn......he is sleeping now.

Raising a child with special needs is a daily dose and I continue to try to do my best. Today, it came with laughter, a bloody lip (mine....an accident) and a snowball fight. Who knows what tomorrow brings.

There's more and more still, but I am bored with it. Time to move forward now. I am trying to think Spring. Who cares that we just got a foot of snow and it is -22 degrees out. I want Punxsutawney Phil to rescind the cold weather and send forth Spring. Mother Nature, are you listening? Please kick Jack Frost to the curb. I'm ready. Are you?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Blue for Bravery

2006-01-30T01:54:00.000-05:00

I went to my cousin's wedding recently. Lucky for me, my good friend, Mr. Bright Eyes came with me and the rugratz.

I've known him about a year and have written a few stories about him. He is a really nice guy and I enjoy spending time with him. It was with him that came the stories of the rubber bracelets which I still wear today. Remember....black for stability bracelet? Then, there was purple and white when I tried to be a drama queen.

Well, it seems likes there is a new color in town. That would be blue for bravery.

Mr. Bright Eyes informed me he saved the black bracelet. Wow. Impress me, why don't you! In his thoughtfullness, he brought me a gift. He gave me a blue one that said bravery. Ok. I am still impressed. He told me that I was amazing and brave to raise kids alone and manage all the things I do. See.....I told you he was amazing in his own right.

We had a great time at the wedding. The rugratz were well-behaved. We met and sat with some good people. And, it was really nice to see some of my Minnesota family together. Although the ceremony was the highlight, I especially loved lounging by the fire deep in conversation with him. I floated on air the whole 2 1/2 hour drive home. What a great way to spend a weekend.

Hopefully, he won't disappear in the next few months. He is a natural nomad and is living in his third city since I met him. Maybe if we are lucky, we will actually get to spend some time together before I take my permenent leave of the great state of Minnesota. I guess it is my turn to be a nomad. We will see. In the mean time, I will enjoy being brave as he seeks his stability.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

911 Call

2006-01-20T11:42:00.000-05:00

I have a wonderful named Judy. She lives in Ohio. I met her while attending community college. She is a little querky, but that is just what makes Judy so fun.

About 8 years ago, we all went to Cedar Point. I believe it was Judy, Kel and I. We ended up soaked from the water rides and decided to head to Judy's house to dry off since her house was the closest. While waiting for our clothes, Judy showed us her computer and some files she was sent by friends. This was my first contact with this 911 call.

All I remember was that Kel and I couldn't stop laughing. I know a few people who would find themselves in the same 911 predicament as this caller from New York.

Today, when I cleaned out some of my email, I found the file still in that email from her. I guess I do save things too long, but after 8 years, it is still giving me the gift of laughter. I figure it is something worth sharing.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

I caught da Tater

2006-01-13T08:58:00.000-05:00

Last night, I took my daughter to see Ron White perform his stand-up routine. She was pretty excited to see one of her favorite comedians. I was looking forward to it too.

While we waited for the show to begin, we wondered if he had all new material or if we were seeing the Tater Salad routine. Happily, he gave us a whole new earful and managed all the hecklers really well. Ron did talk about how "f#%&ing cold" it is here which every comedian does. He teased about Minnesotans claiming it was warm this winter.

He had just flew from Atlanta, Georgia and 70 degree weather to Walker, Minnesota and 25 degree weather. So he was definitely dealing with weather shock. Just a quick note....we should be more like 25 degrees below zero, but Mother Nature is having hot flashes this year.

Ron had his cigar and his bottle of Johnny Walker Black on hand throughout his show. He relit and refilled throughout the night. My daughter asked me if it was apple juice. I told her to look at his eyes. We are talking really glassy and bloodshot.

We were seated in the second rowand cetered to the microphone so we could actually see the color and condition of his eyes really well. He was definitely drinking the real shebang. They set up him up with his ashtray, ice and his bottle front and center. But anyhow, he was able to put on one helluva show. Ron doesn't miss a beat and kept the flowing going for the entire 1 1/2 set. He is an excellent storyteller and weave together tales of Sluggo, Jeff Foxworthy, Larry the Cable Guy, Bill Engvall, his wife, his mother, and various people he has observed on the plane. By the way, Jeff said "hi."

One thing I really liked about his show was his respect for the Tribe. Sometimes, his comedy genre can be negative towards Native Americans and other minorities. Not Ron in particular, but some "redneck" humor in general. I appreciate Ron's respect. We have enough racism in this area as it is. I did hear a few people a couple rows behind me say a few negative things, but overall it went well.

Well if you happen to get lucky and have Ron roll through your area, my daughter and I recommend attending his show. We had a good time and look forward to his return next year.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

BEING INDIAN IS....

2006-01-13T08:40:00.000-05:00

Being Indian Is....feeding anyone and everyone who comes to your door hungry with whatever you have.
Being Indian Is....at age three, knowing to "duck" or "hide" when you see the cops from a mile away!!!
Being Indian Is....loving frybread, mac and dry meat.
Being Indian Is....knowing history started before 1492.
Being Indian Is....full of acronyms that affect your world (INAC, FSIN, RTC, AFN, STC, BTC, MLTC, IHS, BIA) .
Being Indian Is....losing your job after the grant ends.
Being Indian Is....using your treaty rights to create your own job for yourself and your family so you won't have to depend on a grant for your job!
Being Indian Is....knowing all the quick remedies of getting rid of hickies :o)
Being Indian Is....going to pick herbs in the bushes or muskeg with your kokum.
Being Indian Is....to not pay your phone bill or light bill to feed your family.
Being Indian Is....to grow your own food and feel good about your harvest you brought in because you worked hard for it!
Being Indian Is....going for the hunt and coming back with your kill.
Being Indian Is....respecting your elders who have earned it.
Being Indian Is....never giving up the struggle for survival.
Being Indian Is....being known for your great sense of humor and having the ability to make jokes and laughter out of the worst situation.
Being Indian Is....to be judged harder by other natives than non-natives.
Being Indian Is....working together, first with yourself, your family,your community, and with other communities.
Being Indian Is....playing basketball at the outdoor courts on the rez til 3:00 am.
Being Indian Is....either borrowing or lending money to your skinbrothers and sisters at least once a week.
Being Indian Is....having people ask if they can touch your hair or take your picture or how long have you been growing your hair... and so on...
Being Indian Is....to be asked constantly if you still live in tee-pees or ride horses every where you go.
Being Indian Is....worrying about diabetes. So eat healthy, keep fit, and pray.
Being Indian Is....using the medicine circle (wheel) to balance your whole being.
Being Indian Is....knowing why the rez car in "Smoke Signals" was funny!
Being Indian Is....knowing what they meant in "Smoke Signals" by "Do you have your passports?"
Being Indian Is....knowing how to barter or trade.
Being Indian Is....having more cousins than trees have leaves.
Being Indian Is....laughing with your friends so much your facial muscles hurt.
Being Indian Is....singing 49 songs using a garbage can for a drum.
Being Indian Is....road trips cross country just because....
Being Indian Is....having the strength to move your family at any given moment and making it like we did a long time ago to move from camp to camp.
Being Indian Is....reading about your ancestors and relations in an anthropologist paper. Let them read about us in Anthro when we get our freedom back.
Being Indian Is....knowing someone in Saskatoon, Cass Lake, Red Lake, Edmonton, Thunder Bay, Winnipeg, Lac Courte Oreilles, Pine Point, Mahnomen, Mille Lacs, Regina, and let's not forget Saddle Lake...
Being Indian Is....losing your job because you stand for what you believe is right.
Being Indian Is....having a song come to you at the oddest times. Howa!
Being Indian Is....standing in line for $5.
Being Indian Is....waiting up till your parents get back from BINGOjust to see if they won!
Being Indian Is....celebrating the buffalo hunt (use your imagination!).
Being Indian Is....not a right -- it's a privilege!
Being Indian Is....PRIDE!!
Being Indian Is....BEAUTIFUL!!
Being Indian Is....FOREVER!!
Being Indian Is....how YOU want it to be!

Thanks to Shano for sending this to me.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

QOTD 6

2006-01-13T08:30:00.000-05:00

?Question of the Day?

When was the last time you laughed so hard that a trip to the bathrrom was neccessary and what was so funny?

May, 2005...in the restaurant at the casino......3 am......with my best friend.....
I don't know exactly what was funny, but soemhow at that point in time everythings was. Maybe it was the time of day, but we laughed so hard for over an hour that I was sure they would kick us out. They didn't, but my stomach hurt from laughing that hard. I swear mom....no drugs or alcohol. Kel and I just have it like that.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

They call him Tater Salad

2006-01-07T17:32:00.000-05:00

I remember the first time I watched Blue Collar Comedy Tour I. I laughed really hard. Although I enjoyed all the sets, I really laughed hard when I heard Ron White. I don't know what it was, but I really "got" his comedy. He has a natural story-telling ability and is easy to connect to. I ended up buying the dvd so I could watch it whenever I needed that extra little joy in my day.

My daughter watched the dvd one day. Boy, did she get a real kick out of it. She loved Ron's bit about his alias being Tater Salad. Parts of his routine actually became quotes we used in our home and in personal conversation. Although she, liked the other guys on the tour, Sluggo's owner was her favorite.

Last year, Larry the Cable Guy was in Duluth, Minnesota on my birthday. It just so happened that the kids and I were there too. We had a pow wow and a circus in our schedule, which left limited room for Larry. When the window to go opened, circumstance closed it again quickly and we left Duluth disappointed. On the long journey home, we figured we would catch him next year when his tour passed by us again.

Around that time, we heard Bill Engvall was in the Twin Cities. We had his cd and loved his dorkfish story. Til this day, we still ask each other "what do you feed a dorkfish?" and then laugh like crazy when my son does his impression of Bill and says corndog. Once again, circumstances did not include the opportunity to make his show either. Poor baby girl.

Well, Santa and her momma thought she was pretty good this year and pulled a few strings. This week, Ron is heading to a casino near us. We are lucky enough to have seats in the second row. Her first "concert" experience will be in the second row. Lucky her. I can't begin to explain her excitement. Talk about happy happy joy joy. I am just glad I can help make one of her wishes come true. Score one for the mom.

WLB UPDATE

Well, on November 20, I started this plan to lose weight with a friend. Well, planned it all out and began the long road to a better body and better health. Here's the latest....

Shanbob says she is doing good. She struggled over the holidays, but is doing her exercise thing. I'm proud she is making it work. Way to go Shanbob!

I on the other hand am struggling. I am 13 lbs. down with a million more steps to take. Whoever said 10,000 steps was an hour of walking lied. I think I only hit 3500 today. I guess that is good for a day of rest, but still makes me realize that I have a long walk in front of me. Plus, the pressure of summer is on my back. 5 1/2 months and it is bathing suit time. Oh no. Time to move again.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's WHAT?

2006-01-05T02:48:00.000-05:00

My internship started back today. The only difference now is that I am there an extra day and it is paid. Yeah! I believe I can create miracles and am beginning my Disney fund. I figure I can save 1/3 of the cost by June from my income. The rest will have to come from creative sources. Probably ebay. Gotta clear out anyways. Might as well share some of my beautiful things to fund my dream. What do they call that....paying my dues or is it reaping what I sow? Anyways, I believe.

SWITCH! New topic.

One of the things I like to do is look at houses. I am a HGTV fan and love seeing the beautiful homes on their shows. My best friend shares this passion too. This is great because we can talk details about projects seen on tv and know exactly what the other is talking about. Tis true that two great minds think alike.

Another thing we like to do is check out the Dream House built by the Lake County YMCA in Ohio. They build a house and furnish it every year to be raffled off. When you buy a ticket, you get to take a tour of it. I am usually back in Ohio during that time every year and try to never miss it. Who knows, maybe the BFOE or me will get lucky one year.

Well, HGTV has started their own Dream House giveaway. They actually started it 10 years ago, but I think I have only been entering it for the past 8 years. It is a beautiful home and you should check it out. Don't forget to enter the drawing.

I believe that someday, I will own my own place. That too, will take a minor miracle, but I can see it in the far off future. Maybe after graduation and after I settle into the community I move to, I will finally lay down some permanent roots. Can my wandering spirit ever truly settle? We will see. We will see.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Evoltsol

2006-01-04T02:29:00.001-05:00

He carries the world upon his shoulders...
He has too much to bare...
He has no one to turn to...
He feels like no one cares...
He is all alone...
In a world full of pain...
And in a moment of sadness...
He turns blood into rain...
But it's ok...
Because it's over now...
He gave up dreams of tomorrow...
When he threw in his towel...
He left me without a goodbye...
Leaving me to wonder the question why...
He was on the floor...
In piles of his tears...
And now his face will haunt me...
In my dreams for years...
I wish I could have saved him...
I didn't see the clues...
In the end of it all...
Each of us lose...
I love him...
And it's how it will always be...
That time when he got angry...
And murdered me.

Something woke me up and made me scribble this down. I don't know where it came from, but I felt compelled to share.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Happy 2006!

2006-01-01T01:38:00.000-05:00

I hope your 2006 is sweeter than ever!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Disney Debacle

2005-12-31T12:46:00.000-05:00

They say it is the happiest place on earth. I've been there a few times in my life and I can testify that I loved it there. I sure was happy. I would sure be happy if I could find my way back there again.

I talk to the kids about going to Walt Disney World about once every year. I send for the vacation video and watch with anticipation. I always hope that somewhere in my budget is a few dollars to start saving for a journey to my mouse mecca. Sadly, there just never is.

I've been a single parent for pretty much most of my children's lives. When I was married, I still was serving as the primary parent while he focused on his military career. You do what you have to do when you become a parent and I have accepted the responsibilities that come with the position. It is a life-long commitment that brings me more than I ever thought it would.

I always said I never wanted children in high school. We would speculate about our futures and mine never included little ones toddling around. I knew after babysitting that children were alot of work. It was permanent overtime with no pay. Sure, they are benefits, but once you accepted it there was no backing out. You are locked in for life. So, my prediction of my future in high school never included rugrats.

It is amazing how things change when you are in love. I got that nesting bug really bad and then ......"poof"......out popped my first commitment. Talk about life changing. Did you know that 24/7/365 never ends? That's how much time I needed to spend raising my baby girl bundle. I spent the first year of her life figuring out what kind of parent I wanted to be and what my beliefs were. I knew this foundation would be life-affecting, so I needed to get it right. Next thing I know, love blindsided me again......"poof"......out popped another commitment. My baby boy bundle added much love to my life. I really needed that too since at this point I knew single motherhood was in my future. It was the one thing I wanted to avoid, but not at all costs. I still had a pretty good opinion about being in a healthy relationship and the strength to walk away when it got bad. Boy, did it get bad.

We all survived the crash. I just tried to pick up what was left and started moving towards a brighter future. I had too. I had a commitment to uphold. I felt like a momma duck with ducklings in tow. Wherever I went, they followed without question. Quack, quack, waddle, waddle.

I went back to college and began my great career as a juggler. I juggled up to three jobs, two kids, volunteer work and lots of homework from my double major. I even gave up dating to focus on priorities. At one point, I had the opportunity for Harvard dangled in front of me. My dream school was no longer the dream for me. Graduating and getting a good job to support the rugrats was my number one focus.

I still remember graduation......magna cum laude with a B.S. and a B.A.......and two beautiful rugrats cheering me in the crowd. I wondered why I felt no sense of accomplishment. I know I was disappointed that my family or friends didn't attend, but I think it was more than that. After an 8 year journey, I think deep down I knew it wasn't over. I was right. Graduate school, here I come!

Graduation is in May. I can't wait. I am ready to move from poor college student to successful professional. I think the kids will be happy not seeing me glued to the computer for days trying to complete another research paper. That freedom is so close. Yeah!

Once again the Magic Kingdom is calling me. Too bad my checkbook says call back in a few years. I tease my kids that the mothership is calling me home. Now, I just have to find a way to make it happen. It will probably be in a few years to my dismay. The rugrats are getting big and will have to be bribed to hug "a man in a mouse suit" if we don't get there soon. I want them to feel the magic of Disney before the skepticism of being a teenager blocks their childhood ability for making-believe. I know I have a small window left, but I know where I go, they will follow. Quack, quack, waddle, waddle.

I found out today that I didn't get the job. They said that I interviewed really well, but the other person had more experience and her master's degree. I actually don't feel sad about it since I will still be there interning. Now, I have the opportunity to learn more from another professional which will make me a better practitioner. I have always been aware of the growth that this experience brings and look forward to working with someone new. I was offered something to my surprise. They want to pay me for my internship now. It's not much, but it is something. Definitely not enough for trip to Orlando or even a trip to the Cities, but it will help keep the mini-van on the road. I like surprises.

I let the kids down gently. They knew that the trip was off for this year when I told them about the job. My son asked me if I would let Oprah know. They remember when she made some wildest dreams come true last year. My daughter kept asking me to write in, but I never would. I never felt deserving. I do what needs to be done, but still working on making the world a better place. I think I need another ten years. Do you think Oprah will be on then? LOL!

As for now, I will dream of visiting the Magic Kingdom. I will continue my daily journey, but will keep the hope alive. One of these days, I'll be purchasing those tickets and making those reservations. And you know who will be behind me, following in my footsteps?

Quack, quack, waddle, waddle.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Love Lessons

2005-12-29T03:23:00.000-05:00

I love romantic comedies. I think I always have. I grew up hoping that although reality resides in a different sphere, romance was possible and love was all you needed. Boy, do I know different now.

I had a love talk with my teenage daughter the other day. I worry about her and when she has that "first love" experience. She can carry a tough exterior, but deep down she is a big softie. I am trying to keep communication open between us and give her as much sage advice as I can. When I reflect over the lessons I have learned, I am amazed by some of my experiences. Here's a few:

Lesson #1: Love is all you need.

Flat out lie. Love is great, but it pays no bills, offers no health insurance, or provides any security. You have to work for those things. And if you blow off the job to spend time with the one you love, you can lose the job, the house, the insurance, and any security you have.

The ex-husband and I had love. Without a doubt, it was deep. We had alot of connections in the beginning, but as things changed, so did we and in different directions. The very connections that brought us together in the beginning were not there in the end to sustain us. I think I will always love the person he once was, but that is now nothing but a memory.

In a relationship, you need more than love. There needs to be more connections than just love for it to work long term. I like the definition for companion. It is one that is closely connected with something similar. I believe that the more connections you have, the more likely you can grow together as a couple. Maybe in love, all you need is good companionship.

Lesson #2: Love can be painful bliss.

Ok. Everybody experiences the different levels on the love continuum. We get the pure joy and excitement when you go through the "I'm falling in love" stage. We all feel so happy and content when we know that we love each other. We experience that nervousness and confused love when things change in the relationship or we have that big fight. Sadness fills our heart when the one we loves betrays us in some way. It is the deep pain of loss we experience when the relationship ends and love moves slowly from the heart into the memories in your brain.

I love the feeling of falling in love. I look forward to it and those giddy feelings. It reminds me of high school and the wonderful dating scene then. That scene hasn't changed much. The only thing is that the guys are older. And by the way, has any guy in Minnesota heard of Sweetest Day? It's in October people. Come on guys.....I know it's hunting season, but can you find a little bit of romance in Too Cold, Minnesota? Ok...enough ranting. Hopefully, one day in the near future, I will jump back on the love continuum and enjoy that initial rush.

Although most people enjoy those early rushes of falling in love, I believe people prefer to remain in the happy and content continuum level. It is the place people in healthy relationships reside. If you can not get back to this place after betrayl or a big fight, you might keep heading in the opposite direction and ending the relationship. Maybe this is a reason for make-up sex....to help us recover our spot on the love continuum.

Lesson #3: Love doesn't always love you back.

"You have enough love for the both of us." Yep. I was fed this line. He knew I loved him, but was too afraid to love me back. I loved him anyways. I also had lots of tear-filled nights trying to deal with this guy. Boy, was it painful. I got the message eventually. No matter how much I loved him, he might not ever love me.

After a few more tries and some more pain, I learned about unconditional love. Loving someone without any conditions or expectations can be difficult, but is possible. My children receive it daily. With all their faults and errors, I will always give them my love. The same goes for a few select people in my life. I expect nothing from them, but will continue to love them throughout my life. They just got it like that.

I was once asked if I could love a spouse unconditionally. No. I couldn't. A spousal relationship has certain expectations and obligations which places conditional boundaries. I want that in a marital partner. Now, I would offer my unconditional care and a permenant place in my memories as long as I don't develop Alzheimer's, but that woould be the best I could do.

There are many other lessons in love. Maybe in future posts, I will continue to explore them as I continue my conversations with my children. I know they each have to experience heartbreak, loss, and love conflicts in their lives. I just hope I am preparing them properly. I always want them to know that they are always loved. If one day when they are grown, they tell me that they always felt loved, I will know that I did at least part of my job right.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

We Made It

2005-12-26T22:42:00.000-05:00

We did it.

We baked the cookies. We fed the reindeer. We even tracked Santa online after calling NORAD to find out he was heading here next. We opened the presents. We ate the leftover cookies. We feasted on ham and other yummies. We talked to friends and relatives. We snuggled and watched the Christmas specials. We even belted out a few carols along the way.

Wow. I am tired.

At least there are leftovers to munch. There are bargains to find. There are decorations begging to return to the basement. There are new toys to play with and new movies to watch.

There were cookies to nibble. There were many smiles and surprises. There were new memories made and traditions carried on. There were pictures taken and people missed.

It was a wonderful holiday.

I hope your holiday was wonderful too.

Come to think of it, the countdown begins again. There are 364 days til Christmas.

The Rugratz love Christmas.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Merry Merry Christmas!

2005-12-25T21:14:00.000-05:00

My family
would like to wish you
a very merry Christmas
and
good tidings
throughout this
joyous holiday season.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Not Even Nervous

2005-12-22T01:02:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow, I am going in for a job interview. What is interesting about this is that I am interning at this agency in this very role for my graduate degree. My intern is only 16 hours a week, so I would have to step it up a bit with a 40 hour work week. Plus, I would have two classes to attend to in addition, two children to take care of, a 50 mile one-way commute, and a weekly schedule of homework from hell as I wrap my grad program up.

I wonder if I am up to juggling again. I reached my burn limit last time when too many balls were in the air. Then again, some of those balls were on fire and gave me no choice but to let them go. That was when....I had a life, but my job ate it.

I actually really like my placement. Social work is a field I never knew I wanted, but flourish naturally in. Clinical social work is something I actually like to do. Maybe it is because I enjoy using my interpersonal communication skills. That micro practice of one-to-one contact or small groups is were I thrive.

When I look back over my life, I see all of the curves and obstacles in my path that I endured while trying to find my place. Just in my academic field, I traveled through engineering, nursing, education, community health and Indian studies before finding social work. But somehow, my employment life knew that helping people was where I needed to be. From working at a homeless shelter, a women's center, providing child care, being an assistant health director and teacher, an Early Head Start home visitor and classroom teacher to putting in time in children services, I have learn my role as a social helper.

I like that I am also still evolving. I know I will continue to learn and grow. What I do today, will not be what I am doing in 5 years or even 10 years. I will continue to up my game and take those next steps. I like new things so change is not a problem for me. My life continues its roller coaster ride and I enjoy every second.

As for tomorrow, I will continue to not be nervous. If it is meant to be, I will know soon enough that I will be filling in my schedule with forty hours. If not, I will enjoy the 16 hours a week I do and will walk away in May with a smile.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Incident Before Christmas

2005-12-18T15:47:00.000-05:00

Play da game here!!!

I like this game. Watch out and don't freeze! Enjoy!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Where in the World?

2005-12-18T12:23:00.000-05:00

Here's some photo clues about my journey.....

Can you figure out where I have been?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

The Return of the Leaving

2005-12-18T11:21:00.000-05:00

As the chorus goes....

Boy, I'm leaving you again and I thought I'd tell you when. I know how you must feel, but if your love's for real. You'd try to understand that I'm in popular demand.

When we first met, I told you how it would be. You said you understood and that you'd still keep loving me. Now, it seems your changing your mind each and everytime. One day, we will meet. You just wait and see. Because as of today, it has to be this way. Oh, wo, wo.

Boy, I wish that there was a way for you and I to stay together forever everyday. Boy, I would give you all of my love and place no one above. Boy, one day, we would meet. You just wait and see. But as of today, it has to be this way. Oh, wo, wo.

Oh boy, please tell me. Is there a way for you and I to stay together forever everyday. Oh, oh. oh. Please tell me. Do you still love me? Regardless through the way I leave, cause that's the way it has to be.

Shoop, shoop, doo wop means I'm never gonna give you up!

I've been MIA for awhile. Sometimes, my focus has to be on things I don't necessarily like, but have to do to keep moving on my path. Thank goodness I liked a few things in there. But, good news for all ye faithful. My return has come. And when I say return, I mean actual return. See, I just flew back to town yesterday as part of all the things I was doing. I did the student exchange thing and met some really great people. I took a few tours, ate some good food, and slept in a really amazing bed. Overall, as Martha would say....it was a very good thing.

Anyways, if you didn't figure it out earlier, the words in color above are lyrics to a favorite song of mine. It's called "I'm Leaving You Again" by New Edition. Here's a link on Amazon.com that let's you listen to a clip of it and other songs from the 1984 New Edition album. Scroll to the bottom of the page to the "Listen to Samples" section.

I fell for this song back in junior high in my Benji days. I think it meant something to me because we were such an on again/off again couple. Sadly to say, popularity was important to him. He wanted his friends to love him. Too bad that some of them were just plain creeps and ended up hurting him. But now, I am sure he has clarity and peace and all the love he ever needs. He'll always have mine.

Once again, back to New Edition.....LOL. When I was 15 years old, I bought tickets to the New Edition concert in Cleveland at the "Front Row Theater". It was a cool place because the venue was designed in circular shape and the stage moved slowly in circles in the middle. It was New Edition's Love Tour and the best seats we got was for the last row. We didn't care. We just wanted to go. There was one hitch. We had no ride. There was only one solution. I could drive, but only if I got my license the day of the concert. Talk about pressure. I remember practicing like crazy. I was worried about parallel parking, but somehow had managed to pull it off without hitting a cone. My only mistake was when we came upon an intersection and he said take a left. There were two lefts and I guess I chose the wrong one. I still passed and we were able to go to the concert afterall. Last row turned out to be lucky. The sound both was behind us and so were the dressing rooms. While we waited for the concert to begin, we got to see all the members either in the booth or in their dressing room. They were friendly and would wave at us too. I think I was lost in love at that moment and have never forgot it. I did manage to bring back a hat from the concert that Benji later permanently borrowed. That's ok with me because New Edition will always be connected to my time with Benji. It really was a "Love Tour" afterall.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

For the Love of a Rabbit

2005-11-21T12:30:00.004-05:00

Momma loves you soooo much!

Rugratz forever!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

The Plan, buddy included.

2005-11-19T21:48:00.000-05:00

I have been taking this class which has me at the end of my rope. I am so glad I am nearing completion. Winter break may actually be bliss.

Anyways, we have been talking about the Task-Centered Model. This treatment model is based on research and was originally developed for social workers, although it is used in other professions. The task centered model is a short-term problem-solving approach. It focuses on key problems early in treatment and helps the client develop specific goals and timeframes. What I like about this model is that it asks the clients what do they want. Although all clients do not work with social workers because they want to, using a model that incorporates their input may be helpful in building a vested client relationship.

Well, during class, we had to break off into pairs and "play" client and professional. Of course, I headed off with Shanbob to the comfy couches to begin our hour of "play". I was the client first and recited my "poor me, my mom stole my cat" story. After much discussion, we realized that if catnapping the Moo was not an option, that pretty much left praying for a miracle. There was even the thought of a web petition to return my furry fat guy, but that is probably not utile. Mom would say "sure hate it for you" as always. Guess it brings us back to Shanbob's suggestion of counseling and prayer. Oh well. I miss you Moo .

Next up, client Shanbob. I liked her target problem. She wants to lose weight. Don't we all. Well, I wrote her a plan as we discussed her wants and goals. We established a reward plan and timeframes. I did a fantastic job because planning is my forte. Shanbob really liked the plan to the point she decided that she is actually going to follow it. Wow...am I really that good? LOL!

Ok, here is the one part I can't leave out. Shanbob and I are sitting back in the classroom and she asks me the big question.

Dunt-dunt-dunt-ddduuuhhhh!

"Will you do it too and be my buddy? We can help each other."

Let's pause for a moment. I am a thinker and need a sec to realize that bathing suit season is in 7 months.

"Sure" I said.

Now, I begin my new life as a weight-loss buddy aka WLB. Actually, it starts tomorrow. I designed it to begin on Sunday. Why ruin my last Saturday.

It will actually be exciting to have to buy a new bathing suit for Vegas in March. Plus, I have a bet with the kids and I hate losing a bet. I'll give updates to track myself and Shanbob. Any encouragement is deeply appreciated.

See what happens when you learn about treatment models! LOL! I wonder what we will learn next.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Rez Humor

2005-11-17T10:35:00.000-05:00

Found these jokes this morning. I needed the laugh and sure got one with this. Enjoy!

You have to love Indian Women....

For their ability to play rez ball, take care of 20 kids, and manage to make sandwiches at the same time when at a basketball tournament.

For their ability to make a rez car look good.

For their ability to keep sweat pants fashionable no matter what the occasion.

For their ability to make that all-tourney T-shirt and shorts into the one and only Indian "swimsuit."

For their ability to stay out all Friday night at the Indian casino and still hit the Saturday yard sales.

For their ability to give one "look" at their man to shut him up.

For their ability to somehow get her husband to ask for some of his money out of his own paycheck.

You know your ex is rezzed out if.....

1. You broke up with him five years ago and he still tries to fight guys who you are just talking to.

2. He broke the windows on your car because he thought that your cousin who was cruising around with you was your new man.

3. When you left him he had a bon fire with all of your clothes.

4. He tries to pay you back by snagging on all of your cousins, sisters, and your best friend.

5. He blames his drinking binge on your break up.

6. He comes to your house drunker than hell trying to get back together.

7. He tries to cause trouble by telling your new man that you and him were together and that you still love each other.

8. He tries to cause trouble by telling your new man that you're really pregnant with his baby.

9. Even a restraining order can't keep him away.

10. He makes his mom and grandma come talk to you about dropping charges.

11. He comes to reminisce about the good ol' days at 4 am when his "wife" is 7 mos. pregnant!

12. He drives by your house every morning to honk and wave at you and the kids, he "never" visits.

13. He asks the kids if you are seeing anyone right now.

14. He has his mom/dad/sisters tell you how unhappy he is because his wife can't do the things that you can, such as COOK

Does this sound like anyone that you've snagged out or who has snagged you?

Loving Indian Style - How to tell if it's luv "NDN style"

1. He adds you to his welfare cheque

2. He'll buy pampers for your baby, even if the baby ain't his

3. He lets you give him hickies even when you've been together for awhile

4. He hawks his rifle to bail you out of the drunk tank

5. He don't try to check out any of your friends or cuzin's

6. He'll hang onto you while walkin' round the powwow or feast

7. He spends his firefighting check on you

8. He tries to find a job, even when it's not fire season so he can buy you stuff

9. He tells you that you have chokecherry eyes & bannock thighs!

10. He tells you that he luvs you, even when he's sober!

Liver and Cheese

There was these three guys fighting over this beautiful woman.
They were all fighting right, and so the woman said "whoever can make the best sentence out of liver and cheese that's the one I will marry!".
So the first guy said " I like liver but I hate cheese".
Then the second guy said " I hate liver but I like cheese".
Then those two started fighting.
Then the Cree said "Hey liver alone cheese mine!".

I hope you like them. Just wish I knew who wrote them. Somebody is really funny!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

In Memoriam

2005-11-15T20:27:00.000-05:00

My first Vine Deloria book I ever bought was Red Earth, White Lies. I really enjoyed the intellectual depth and passionate creativity found in his writings. His influence on me and many others will long be remembered and serve as inspiration for the next generation. He has definitely earned his spot in the NDN Hall of Fame for his dedication and activism on behalf of Native People everywhere.

The following was posted on November 15, 2005 by Editors Report in Indian Country Today:

Burn tobacco today for the wonderful spirit of Vine Deloria Jr., who passed into the world of the ancestors Nov. 13. Our sincerest condolences and warmest embrace reach out to his family and dear friends, and a great commiseration is extended to all of Indian country, where Deloria - author, teacher, lawyer, man - is universally respected and where his memory will live on for the generations.

Deloria, the world-renown Hunkpapa author and scholar from the Standing Rock Reservation, made a huge contribution to the Native peoples of North America and the world. His intellectual output, at once free-ranging with creativity and yet tight with academic rigor, pinned down the legal and historical bases desperately needed by the national Indian discourse. He provided a great piece of the intellectual locomotion upon which a moving platform of American Indian/Native studies research, publishing, production and teaching has been constituted.

His writing is legendary, launched by the classic ''Custer Died For Your Sins,'' which plugged directly into the common imagination of the American Indian Movement in the 1960s and early 1970s. Along with ''We Talk, You Listen'' and ''Behind the Trail of Broken Treaties,'' these early Deloria works informed, during those crucial years, the widest cross-section of activists, students and older community leaders and traditional authorities. For a movement that had disparate and very independent bases in Indian country, where political persuasions ran the full spectrum of left to right and front to back, Deloria's deliberate, well-reasoned tone, backed by acerbic wit and genuine self-effacement, hit the formative chord.

The best of the thinking, and the music of a movement of survival, started then, with Deloria's exquisite ear for media concepts and the lyrics and guitar of a musician brother named Floyd ''Red Crow'' Westerman. Anthems of a movement came out of that collaboration - again, now in Westerman's lyrics, ''Custer died for your sins - a new day must begin - Custer died for your sins,'' and in the old 49er stand-by, ''BIA I am not your Indian anymore.'' Targeting anthropologists, missionaries and bureaucrats alike, Deloria wrote to Indians and was heard by the national audience. He wrote popular narratives on the contemporary Indian world, backing those up with deep and far-ranging academic research, writing and editing.

Deloria went on to write and edit more than 20 books and ranged from Native contemporary issues in law and history to ponder on scientific and theological themes. A considerable risk-taker in an era of prudent assertions in academia, Deloria in his middle years took pleasure in exploding and deconstructing all manner of facile theories by would-be Indian debunkers, such as Sheppard Krech III's critical review of indigenous lifeways in his book, ''The Ecological Indian: Myth and History.'' With his Indian-take dissection of evolutionary theory and its many little-founded claims, Deloria willingly stepped out of the progressive boat and onto his own canoe, daring to follow his instincts into important theological and scientific questions in order widen the field for Indian scholarship. He piqued many in academia and government with his explorations and assertions, but this was the way he seems to have preferred it - in the arena, moving the ground forward for the people.

The author and professor was an impeccable social activist, supporting Indian movement activism in all fields faithfully, always giving of himself through lectures and strategic seminars and court testimony wherever Indian tribal people called upon him. Executive director of the National Congress of American Indians early in his career, Deloria radicalized and activated the foremost Indian advocacy organization while creating lobbying campaigns and providing strategy for court cases: often while also defending major community treaty activists such as Nisqually elder and fishing rights legend Billy Frank Jr.

Deloria straddled the generations and carried the perspectives and perception of the generation of leaders who saw Indian country through the Depression, World War II and termination. He often reminisced fondly about the old-timers of his formative years.

We remember the beloved teacher for his generosity of spirit. As a professor, Deloria mentored and touched many people across all ethnic and religious persuasions while always managing to teach and guide the work of scores of Native graduate students and young activists, many of whom went on to gain success and prominence on their own. He wrote prefaces and introductions and recommendations by the dozens in careful assessments of the work at hand, but was always ready to add his considerable gravity to the work of newer hands. He would not tolerate fuzzy thinking, however, and could and would hold his students to task.

No strangers here to the inspiration extended by the existence of Vine Deloria Jr., we are ever-thankful to have had the opportunity to have celebrated his accomplishments earlier this year at the ceremony for the 2005 American Indian Visionary Award, which Deloria received in March.

In every generation, to paraphrase the late Creek Medicine Man Phillip Deere, there is one who hits the click-stone just right, and sparks the fire. In his generation, Vine Deloria Jr. sparked the intellectual fire of political, legal, historical and spiritual illumination. He lighted the path to the fountainhead of knowledge, which points the way ahead.

We are deeply thankful for the gift of this man who taught, in the evidence of his own life, that a gift of intellectual power is only given spirit by service to the people.

The following was posted on November 14, 2005 by Jim Adams in Indian Country Today:

TUCSON, Ariz. - Vine Deloria Jr., the intellectual star of the American Indian renaissance, passed on Nov. 13, after struggling for several weeks with declining health. His immeasurable influence became immediately apparent in an outpouring of tributes from all corners of Indian country.

''I cannot think of any words I could possibly say that even begin to capture the significance of this man and his work among Native people and on our behalf for the past half century,'' said Richard West Jr., director of the National Museum of the American Indian in a message to his staff.

''He has been our ranking scholar and intellectual light for all of those years.''

The NMAI was only one of many Native institutions that Deloria made possible or deeply influenced during his 73 years. From the activist end of the spectrum, a tribute on the Colorado AIM Web site said, ''It is safe to say that without the example provided by the writing and the thinking of Vine Deloria Jr., there likely would have been no American Indian Movement, there would be no international indigenous peoples' movement as it exists today, and there would be little hope for the future of indigenous peoples in the Americas.''

Deloria wrote more than 20 books, starting with his best seller ''Custer Died for your Sins'' in 1969. His powerful, acerbic criticism made a deep impression on the dominant culture as well as the activist movement then erupting on the scene. But he has an even longer career working behind the scenes of Native organizations.

He was drafted, as he put it, to be executive director of the National Congress of American Indians in 1964. He was a founding trustee of the NMAI when it consisted of the Gustav Heye collection in New York City and helped guide its sale to the Smithsonian Institution. He was a major thinker for the movements for sacred land protection, for treaty rights and for the protection and repatriation of Indian remains.

In spite of his trenchant criticism of European Christianity, he also served for a time on the executive committee of the Episcopal Church of the U.S.A. He was the fourth generation descendant of the Yankton Sioux prophet Saswe, and his father and grandfather were both prominent Episcopal churchmen.

TIME magazine once called Deloria one of the 10 most influential theologians of the 20th century. This March he received the second annual American Indian Visionary Award from Indian Country Today. In a self-deprecating acceptance speech abounding in anecdotes and teasing humor, Deloria gave credit to the remarkable generation of leaders that it was his privilege to work with, beginning with his service at the NCAI.

Deloria was born in 1933 in Martin, S.D., on the border of the Pine Ridge Reservation. Although his lineage was predominately Yankton Dakota, his grandfather Philip, an Episcopal priest, had enrolled the family in the Standing Rock Sioux Reservation, where he was stationed.

Deloria served in the U.S. Marine Corps and received a master's degree from the Lutheran School of Theology in Rock Island, Ill. After his stint at the NCAI, he pursued an academic career, culminating in the position of professor of history at the University of Colorado.

He remained an incisive writer and social critic to the end. He refused an honorary degree from the University of Colorado because he disapproved of its performance during an athletic scandal. During his last year, he was at work on a major book on the miraculous deeds of American Indian medicine men.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Word Junkie Confession

2005-11-15T19:16:00.000-05:00

I am a word junkie. I love learning new words. I especially love the big ones that are diffcult to pronounce. I go online daily to Merriam-Webster's site for their Word of the Day. Sometimes, I have to listen to the pronounciation of the word several times to be able to say it correctly. I don't mind one bit. I actually find much joy in the challenge. I try to use these words in my school papers and in my blog as practice. If I can use the word everyday for a week, I feel happy. If I can incorporate it into my normal vocabulary, then I feel damn special. It is my own personal challenge....my own personal word game.

Today, it was all about two new words....

I had a brief discussion with a classmate yesterday during our class break. I was given a copy of a guide to visiting Las Vegas by another student and was reading a review of a restaurant/lounge. It describes it as being cacophonous. I had never heard of the word cacophonous and neither did the other graduate students sitting around me. I knew I would have to look it up at home and shared my love for big words with my classmate. She proceeded to tell me how she felt that people who like to use large words that other people didn't understand were stuck up and snobby.

Wow.

I am not stuck up or snubby at all. I just like words. Too bad her nescience of an expanded vocabulary and lack of comprehension of large words like cacophonous stimulate her to make inaccurate judgment calls. We are students by the way, so learning should be our forte.

I believe nescience isn't bliss afterall especially when trying to get your scrabble or boggle game on. It is then that my vocabulary knowledge is my guiding light to victory.

BTW, I am always ready for a challenge to exercise my letter tiles or my lettered dice. I got the games. Wanna play?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Blog Tag & Cold Weather

2005-11-13T23:39:00.000-05:00

As I was reading one of my favorite blogs called It's All About Me! Deal With It! by Mon, I saw a link in one of her stories to check out.

I clicked away and it led to Random Thoughts and Confessions of an Urban Woman by Femi-mommy. On there, she listed the following on her blog and I thought it would be interesting to do here:

1. Go into your archives.
2. Find your 23rd post.
3. Post the fifth sentence (or closest to it).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five other people to do the same thing.

I haven't really gone through some of my old stories in a long time. It was even more interesting to see what story was #23 since I never numbered them. I started at the beginning and counted them all off until I reached number 23. Well, we have a winner after all....

#23 turns out to be from Saturday, November 20, 2004. It was called "Sunrise"

Here's the fifth sentence....

I love to see the light sparkle on the clouds and on the lake when it enters the horizon.

I remember when I wrote this. I use to go out to the lake in the morning and watch the sunrise. Since the lake is across the street, it is easy to do. Lately, I haven't been home when the sun rises here. Tomorrow it rises at 7:23 a.m. and just maybe, I'll make it down by the lake in time except there may be a small problem. They have predicted many clouds will be hanging around here in the morning making it difficult to see the sun. Plus, we are suppose to get snow tomorrow and have a high of 33°F. By 4:44 p.m tomorrow, the sun will be gone and the cold temperature will drop even farther. I can't believe it will be dark before 5 p.m. This seems so crazy to me. I go to work and come home from work in the dark. What fun! =(

Maybe making snow angels and busting out the hot cocoa and marshmallows will make everything even out. I'll let you know how it goes....

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

QOTD 5

2005-11-10T21:55:00.000-05:00

?Question of the Day?

You take a trip with your best friend in Vegas. It is bright lights and everything you expected. One night after gambling and partying at a local club, you head back to your hotel room. When you enter the elevator, you spy your favorite actor riding alone. After several stares and a few quick winks, you realize you are being hit on. You are shocked and flattered, especially after receiving the invitation to eat breakfast in his/her's hotel suite. Do you decline or ditch the best friend?

What should I do Kel? Mr. Bloom needs breakfast companionship. I bet she would "ditch" me to make sure I went. She loves me that much. BFOE!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

You'z Got 2 Chill

2005-11-04T21:43:00.000-05:00

It is taking over my house. Everybody is ill today.

I knew last night that today was going to be bad. I was having trouble breathing and was feeling wiped out. I've been on anitbiotics since Monday with no improvements. Now, the very airway I appreciate so much was trying to shut the doors and put the closed sign up. If your air capacity is the size of a basketball, mine was feeling shrunk to a plum. I tried hard to not panic and kept using the inhaler the doctor gave me. This morning was even a harder battle to get the air in. I knew I was staying home today to try to recover.

Ring! Ring! Ring!

My son's school. It was the nurse. Please come get him she said. Really? Ok.

She found me when I got there. She asked if I was ok. I must be really looking beat up as I gasp for air. I guess my baby was spending some time at a puke party and needed some TLC. With his bag in tow, we were off to the clinic to upgrade my meds. After an hour and a half of sleeping in the waiting lounge, I informed the staff we were heading home to bed and they would have to call me when they could see me.

Fast forward 3 hours...

Hello. The doctor has changed your meds. Please come pick them up. The pharmacy closes in 15 minutes.

I can drive fast when I can't breath. I was there in 7. There was even an outfit change squeezed in there. I'm bad butthere was no way I was wearing my new jammies into a public building full of sick people. It's bad enough, I have my own germs to spread.

After a inhaler demo by the pharmacist and a run through on my new med schedule, I head home. It is time to check on the son still making dashes to the bathroom. Thank goodness he can sprint when he wants to. He thinks the meds he took two days ago is the the yellow stuff he sees. This turns into a long talk about body functions and fluids. What joy! I just want to breath.

Next, my other child walks in. She wants to me to fix her foot. She has two sores on one of her feet, which after close inspection looks like warts. Great. I treat my baby up and move back to snuggling the other child.

In the background, I hear my mom hack away. She came to visit and is now too sick to drive back to the Land of Buckeyes. She is hoping to get over this soon to get home, but was told today to take her time. I guess my step-dad wants nothing to do with the germs in my house. Who can blame him.

I guess I am going to go back in the other room and snuggle with my child and keep sipping my diet ginger ale. And although I do not have the flu since mine is bacterial, I would just like to remind all out there who are able to get their flu shots, to do so. I hear the flu this year is nastier than our gas prices.

Take care....

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Break & Pause

2005-11-01T23:03:00.000-05:00

Sorry for my brief absence. I needed to take a break and work on some projects for school. When I finished, I needed a little pause to catch my breath and to get antibiotics. I guess I am really sick afterall.

I found out someone else had a break recently. A nice guy I met awhile ago recently departed from his girlfriend. I guess they had issues they couldn't work out. Now, he is on his own again. I guess it is time for him to take a pause.

A good friend of mine may be heading towards a break. Her and her man have been together forever or so it seems. We are talking years and years and years. After being a part of her children's lives and helping support her when she needed it, he still won't commit. She loves him and has given him her support, but never knows what his real intentions are. I guess he likes the status quo, but sadly it really isn't good enough anymore for her. They have reached ultimatum status and a deadline looms in the horizon. I hope they can work it out especially since her children are involved. If not and a break is unavoidable, I hope she pauses a bit.

BTW, I heard Vegas is the perfect place to pause. I'm heading there in March. Wanna come?

Anyways.....

He said he loved me. I thought he did. He just kept mentioning her name. I didn't know why.

Initially, he seemed to care. He was strong and supportive. But soon my eyes were opened and I began to see. I would have missed it if I didn't notice the small missteps he took. He thought we were going in that direction. I guess he never really knew me. He didn't get my true reality. He was so not in the know. He kept going back there. He couldn't let go. His stories repeated and my warning flags flapped. I tried to encourage, but he couldn't see. He wanted me to be part of his life, but he had no future. He was stuck in the world that existed before me. I had to let go.

He said he loved me. I thought he did. He just kept mentioning her name. Now, I know why.

Just to let you know....the nice guy from earlier....is here!

LOL!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Sniffles

2005-10-27T06:47:00.000-04:00

It must be that time of year again.

I am on my third day with a sore throat. It seemd to only bother me in the morning and in the evening.....which is about right now. This morning welcomed an addition....the sniffles. I'll have to remember to take my tissues with me when I head out for school today. =(

Being sick reminds me of two things:

1. Growing up, my grandma always made soup for me when I was sick. I loved her soup. She just had the knack for making it taste so perfect everytime. She even let you choose the type of soup you wanted from her great repertoire. My favorite was potato soup and then eventually it was chicken with the funky noodles, but that was after the incident. Click here for more about that story. Now that I have to make my own soup without any of her recipes, I really miss her being here. Although they say chicken soup feeds the soul, I think it was my grandma that actually did.

2. Len, Len, Len.... Please Lord help Len. She is a friend of mine who is about my age. She was sent away to Catholic boarding school when she was young and possibly suffered some repercussions that will always stay with her. One of those repercussions was not spending time with her mom to learn the skills of domestication. I always wondered why she seemed to run a chaotic home. I helped her clean and organize, but she could never keep it up. Even dinner at her house was a fend for yourself event.

I remember when she told me about the boarding school experience. At the time I did not relate it to the troubles she was having in her home until the one day she asked me to help her with her chicken noodle soup.

Len called me over to help her. She was having trouble making chicken noodle soup. I was not surprised when I looked in her pot. She had one whole chicken breast in a pot of boiling water with nothing else. She wanted to know when to add the ramen noodles and if that was when it turned into the soup. After making a return trip home to gather supplies, I went back and taught Len had to make the soup. It was then that it dawbed on me about what Catholic boarding school had done. She missed out on time with her mom and family. It is those times growing up that you learn the skills of domestication like making chicken noodle soup. Len missed all of that. Now, I have tasted her mother's food so I know she can cook, but for Len it is a struggle. Thinking about Len makes me appreciate all the time I spent with my grandma. I have realized that Len can follow a decent recipe, so maybe this year, I'll give her a cookbook for Christmas.

Christmas...OMG! How many shopping days left?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

QOTD 4

2005-10-25T14:14:00.000-04:00

?Question of the Day?

There's a knock at your door. You answer it to find a man with a big blue package. Inside the package is a letter and a pen. You read the letter and it says you won a $5000 gift certificate to any one store in your town. Next, you are instructed to choose the store, fill out the form, and return it to the delivery man. Tomorrow, your gift certificate will arrive. In the few minutes you had to think, what store did you chose and what would you buy tomorrow?

Since I need a vacation, the gift certificate would be for a local travel agent. My friend and I would be doing an all-inclusive week of pampered relaxation. This would let us truly live in the moment away from the daily grind of our lives.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

2 TOUGH QUESTIONS

2005-10-24T01:53:00.000-04:00

I found this online and I thought I would share.....

Question 1:

If you knew a woman who was pregnant who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis, would you recommend that she have an abortion?

Read the next question before looking at the response for this one.

Question 2:

It is time to elect a new world leader, and only your vote counts.
Here are the facts about the three candidates.

Candidate A.
Associates with crooked politicians, and consults with astrologist. He's had two mistresses. He also chain smokes and drinks 8 to 10 martinis a day.

Candidate B.
He was kicked out of office twice, sleeps until noon, used opium in college and drinks a quart of whiskey every evening.

Candidate C.
He is a decorated war hero. He's a vegetarian, doesn't smoke, drinks an occasional beer and never cheated on his wife.

Which of these candidates would be your choice?

Decide first...

No peeking, then scroll down for the response.

Candidate A is Franklin D. Roosevelt.
Candidate B is Winston Churchill.
Candidate C is Adolph Hitler.

And, by the way, on your answer to the abortion question:

If you said YES, you just killed Beethoven.

Pretty interesting isn't it?
Makes a person think before judging someone.
Wait till you see the end of this note!
Keep reading...
Never be afraid to try something new.

Remember....

Amateurs built the Ark.
Professionals built the Titanic.

And finally, can you imagine working for a company that has a little more than 500 employees and has the following statistics:

* 29 have been accused of spousal abuse
* 7 have been arrested for fraud
* 19 have been accused of writing bad checks
* 117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
* 3 have done time for assault
* 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
* 14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
* 8 have been arrested for shoplifting
* 21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
* 84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year

Can you guess which organization this is?

Give up yet?

It's the 535 members of the United States Congress.
The same group that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.

Makes you think a little.....

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

My SW Rant

2005-10-23T13:45:00.000-04:00

I am in a full social work rant after reading and discussing American Indians and social policy. As our class incorporates cultural competence practices into our repertoire, I face the more personal task of actually being the culture we study. Below is a post I made recently, that I thought I would share and record here. Tell me what you think....

__________________________________________________________

Did you ever sing "Ten Little Indians" growing up? It wasn't really an offensive nursery rhyme more like a counting song, right? Did you know that there is an original version of that song written by Septimus Winner in 1868 which is very unlike the water down version sung in classrooms across America.

Here's the real version:

Ten little Indians going out to dine;
One choked his little self and then there were nine.
Nine little Indians sat up very late;
One overslept herself and then there were eight.
Eight little Indians traveling in Devon;
One said he'd stay and then there were seven.
Seven little Indians chopping up sticks;
One chopped himself into halves and then there were six.
Six little Indians playing with a hive;
A bumblebee stung one and then there were five.
Five little Indians going in for law;
One got in Chancery and then there were four.
Four little Indians going out to sea;
A red herring swallowed one and then there were three.
Three little Indians walking in the zoo;
A big bear hugged one and then there were two.
Two little Indians playing with a gun;
One shot the other and then there was one.
One little Indian left all alone;
She went and hanged herself and then there were none.

Now, after reading the original version of that song, how do you feel about it? Would you let your child sing it? One of the authors in a book I've been reading, "Genocide of the Mind - New Native American Writing" addresses the issue about who she is told she is and who she really is. In response to this rhyme, she alters the words to define her own reality. The book is edited by MariJo Moore and Vine Deloria, Jr. writes the forward. It is a very good book giving much insight into several authors and it is difficult for me to put it down. I really recommend it.

While reading all the material for one of my classes, having the discussions and watching the video, I have thought about important issues for social workers to address in dealing with American Indian families and communities. I still keep coming back to one issue over and over again. It is the issue of self and cultural competency.

I have read from various professional organizations their viewpoints and teachings about cultural competence. Recently, I read the following information and suggestions from the American Medical Student Organization (AMSO), which is an group that has a "half-century history of medical student activism, and is the oldest and largest independent association of physicians-in-training in the United States". These are our future doctors, people we as social workers may work with in regards to our own clients.

Here are some suggested activities:

Do a self assessment. This allows students to explore issues of prejudice and bias without judgment by others. Consider topics like your family origins; when, how and why your ancestors arrived; ethnic advantages/disadvantages that you may have; and stereotypes of other ethnicities that you may hold. Then get a group together and do a cultural self assessment. Discuss your similarities and differences.

Go into a community that you would like to learn more about. Community leaders, traditional people and clients are the best educators. Learn more about demographics, traditional beliefs, resources, neighborhood centers, traditional practitioners, social beliefs and practices, and rituals and beliefs surrounding individual, family and community. Then, walk through the community. Visit churches, grocery stores and community events and eat a meal in a neighborhood restaurant.

Work with culturally/ethnically organized student groups, social work groups or community groups and ask about specific topics or competency issues unique to that community. Cultural groups have some social issues that are particularly important to them and you might be able to take part in their organized interventions.

I believe to be effective in social work practice in American Indian communities, social workers need to have this competency and a strong understanding of the history.

Here are some goals of cultural competent service:

1. CULTURAL AWARENESS: Appreciating and accepting differences.

2. CULTURAL KNOWLEDGE: Deliberately seeking out various world views and explanatory models of social work practice. Knowledge can help promote understanding between cultures.

3. CULTURAL SKILL: Learning how to culturally assess a client to avoid relying only on written "facts". Explaining an issue from another's perspective, reducing resistance and defensiveness, and acknowledging interactive mistakes that may hinder the desire to communicate are part of this skill.

4. CULTURAL ENCOUNTERS: Meeting and working with people of a different culture will help dispel stereotypes and may contradict academic knowledge. Although it is crucial to gather cultural knowledge, it is an equally important, but sometimes neglected, culturally competent skill to be humble enough to let go of the security of stereotypes and remain open to the individuality of each client.

Remember, it is important to learn and understand and then to educate others. As social workers, we will come into contact with many people from all walks of life. As I said before, placing people in a dependency status, can destroy them. It takes away the ability to take care of themselves, to function in their traditional ways, and to have strong positive emotional sense of well-being. After several generations of being dependents, where does that leave a culture? Definitely not in a good place. As social workers, we face the results that dependency and other policies have created.

Today, this continues to be an issue as Tribes try to be independent beings. That is what sovereignty is about.

Maybe, if we strive diligently, we will not offend our clients, but offer them a chance to find the independence in their own selves.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

3 Dimensions

2005-10-22T13:50:00.000-04:00

I found this test online. I thought I would share. What are your three dimensions?

The Three Dimension Luck and Power Test

My results are in......

MzAriez is:

Balanced, Believer and Empowered

You feel your life is controlled both externally and internally.
You have a good sense of what you can control and what you should let go.
Depending on the situation, you sometimes try to exert more control.
Other times, you accept things for what they are and go with the flow.

You are a true believer in luck, fate, and karma.
You believe that life is a game of chance - not a game of skill.
You either consider yourself very unlucky or very lucky.
No matter what, you don't feel like you can change the hand you were dealt.

You have a good deal of power, but you also know the pecking order.
You realize that working the system does get you further.
You know who to defer to and who to control.
When it comes to the game of life, you play things flawlessly.
Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

One of My Favorites

2005-10-22T05:03:00.000-04:00

Keith Sweat - I'll Give All My Love To You

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

The Umbrella

2005-10-22T03:14:00.000-04:00

He has his own theme song. He doesn't know it, but he does. I would guess about a dozen people have heard it and maybe a few could actually sing it. This week, I sang it so frequently to pass the time that my friend in Sebeka can now sing it.

What are we singing? Well, the "African Bob Theme Song" of course.

Here's a little background....

In 1996, Kel and I discovered chatrooms on the internet. Our favorite was WBS.net. It was a community of chat rooms and even allowed you to create your own personal chatrooms.

We would type on the two computers in my office side by side. This could go on for hours too. I believe in the beginning we were somewhat addicted because of the things we did to get online. (Sorry, can't share those things. That is restricted info, but just understand we can get into the most interesting situations in minutes. Sometimes, we asked what won't happen to us next.) Anyways, I don't think people had a clue that we were actually sitting next to each other. We knew who was PMing each other and had our own personal commentary going as we typed. It was during this process that we met people like DrSugi, SmuckyKing, AnalSprayer, and even African Bob aka Rob716. It is amazing what proceeded after just chatting with Rob716.

Bob/Rob was actually from Africa. He was working on his doctorate in chemistry in New York. He was a nice guy basically, just a little different....well, maybe a whole lot different. I think we chatted online and talked on the phone for over a year before we actually met. I told him clearly that I was not looking for a boyfriend, just a friend....no benefits. School and kids were my priority and I wanted no complications. Well, one weekend he came to see friends in Cleveland and asked to stay at my place. That was fine and dandy with me as long as Kel stayed too since my kids were at grandma's. If he acted up, I knew we could take him out if we needed to. After that one night, I learned all I needed to know about him. That was:

African Bob is cheap....He took me to dinner and I had to pay my own way.
African Bob can't drive....Kel can vouch for that. I swear he was trying to kill us.
African Bob is not a big meat eater...."Wow! There's enough meat in this whopper for a whole week."
African Bob lacks some common sense....Trivia answer was petroleum jelly. We held up a jar of Vaseline as a clue. He didn't get it.
African Bob is persistent....Many years later, he still showed up at Kel's house.

He wasn't my cup of tea so I chucked him. It was during this time that Kel came up with the theme song that we have been singing ever since. Too bad for Kel that he knew where she lived because he ran crying to her for years. Sorry Kel.

The other inside joke was about the umbrella. When he left my house, he left his umbrella. For years, he asked Kel for the umbrella back. I can only guess that the black and white umbrella was special to him or for some unknown reason he just wanted to talk to me again. Anyways, I kept it because it was a big umbrella. Who doesn't like a big umbrella even with a few holes? I still have it in my closet. Maybe someday I will pass it on to someone else. Until then, it continues to be a reminder of my quote:

No matter how big your umbrella is, sometimes you still get wet.

I heard that African Bob is now Dr. Bob making major dollars in Philly now. I wish him well and I hope that bank buys him some serious driving lessons. Hopefully, he will find someone who loves the qualities he offers. It sure wasn't me.

Kel and I still sing his theme song from time to time. It brings us much laughter and memories or one of the stories that begin with "that one time in Cleveland". So, thanks African Bob....for the memories.....

Un-na-na-na-na-na!
Un-na-na-na-na-na!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Treading Water

2005-10-19T09:25:00.000-04:00

Do you ever think you really know someone? Then one day, they drop the bomb on you and tell you something about themselves that you had no clue about. My friend, Landy, did that to me the other day.

We've been friends for a few years. We met in town while I was working on my undergraduate degree. Landy (his alias) worked at a local restaurant delivering pizza and every once in a awhile he'd be our delivery guy. Landy and I started talking on the phone every so often. In the beginning, it was mostly about current events and the happenings in our small town. Eventually, we discussed dreams and things we wanted to experience in the future. I talked of my new career and he went on and on about finally saving up enough money for cooking school. We even joked that I would be the only social worker with a personal chef. I liked talking with him especially when we talked about life. As time passed, I felt I was starting to really get to know him.

One night three months ago, we were talking about the future. I talked about finally finishing graduate school and moving away in the next year. I asked him what he planned to do. Once again, he talked cooking school. He had received the application and talked with the school's admissions officer. Landy sounded so excited. I was really excited for him.

Forward to last week. It went something like this:

Me: Hey. What's up?
Landy: I need to talk to you.
M: What's going on?
L: I got in.
M: In what?
L: Cooking school.
M: Wow! That's great! Congrats. When did you find out?
L: Three days ago. There's more.
M: What is it?
L: I declined.
M: What??? Why would you do that?
L: I love to cook, but I like my job. I make some nice money. I like where I am so I decided not to go. I don't want to leave.
M: Are you crazy? Is it the money?
L: No. That was covered. I like living in my mom's basement. Plus, I can help her out and still live next to my best friend. Plus, then there's all the free pizza.
M: You did this for free pizza?
L: No. I just am happy with how things are.
M: What's her name?
L: Who?
M: The girl who's whipped you?
L: It's not what you think.
M: What is it then?
L: It's Matt.
M: Your best friend Matt? What does he have to do with you not going to school?
L: I love Matt.
M: We all love Matt. What's your point?
L: I think I am gay.
M: What?
L: I'm gay.
M: How? Since when?
L: Two days ago.
M: WTF, I need more than that.
L: Matt and I were drinking and eating pizza. I told him about school. He was actually upset that I would be leaving. He told me he loved me and we hugged and somehow it became more.
M: More?
L: You know.
M: No, I don't know.
L: We kissed and we did the "Amanda thing".

Let me clarify.... Amanda, his girlfriend from 5 years ago. She was trying to remain "good" for the man she was going to marry. She was willing to strip down to her panties for Landy. She was willing and open to everything sexual except removing or moving the panties. Hence, this tactic has since been referred as the "Amanda thing".

M: Okay. So, you are attracted to men now?
L: Just Matt.
M: What does this mean?
L: I am staying here and life will be the same. Matt will just be a bester buddy than before.
M: And what about the girls you date?
L: I still date. I didn't say I didn't want to date the ladies.
M: I thought that was a given when you said you were gay?
L: I am just gay with Matt.
M: Ohhh. Okay. I understand.
L: I knew you would.
M: I understand that you are crazy. I hope you really know what you are doing. The chance for school doesn't come everyday. Living in Mom's basement may be good today, but what about in six months when she moves to Florida? What are you going to do? Do you want to deliver food forever? Don't you want your own place? Your own life?
L: OMG, I forgot about Florida. At least I still have my job. Don't worry. It will work out. Fate loves me.
M: I hope it does.
L: BTW, don't tell my mom any of this. She'd kill me, then kick me out.
M: You and your chaos.
L: BTW, did you hear? Amanda had a baby.
M: Really?
L: It might be Matt's. He and this other guy have to do DNA test next week.
M: This is too much. Bye Landy.
L: Outie like my broke down Audi...bye.

Whew!
I was not expecting that conversation. I think I learned more about Landy in that conversation than any other before. I took a moment to think about it.

I wonder if he is scared about all the changes. I wonder if he clings to today to try to avoid tomorrow. Maybe it all was just too much for him. In the mean time, he is treading water, as my grandmother called it. He is swimming, but in no particular direction and not moving from his current spot. Too bad he is doing it in a moving river with timelines.

I guess that's one thing I liked about Landy. Usually his surprises are pizza toppings, not all this. Maybe, Landy really has sides to him I never imagined.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

QOTD 3

2005-10-19T08:58:00.000-04:00

?Question of the Day?

You received your disconnect notice from the cable company. You are dead broke and can't pay the bill. The cable office calls you and tells you they will be at your house in one hour to disconnect. What show would you watch during your last hour of cable TV?

Dog, the Bounty Hunter......a few fleeting moments of Leland is worth watching it over and over. He is just that fine.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Jackpot!

2005-10-15T04:10:00.000-04:00

Tonight has been interesting. My friend, Shano from Canada, came down to my town. We have been talking about getting together since the beginning of the year, but to no avail until today. We decided to make a trip over to the casino which is about 12 miles away. She was hoping to spot a particular guy, but making some cash off the machines would be nice too. For whatever reason, the Casino Gods were listening to Shano's prayers. She hit on a few different machines. I know her trip back to Canada will be done with a big smile on her face. Way to go Shano!

I had fun too. I added a few extra dollars to my stash, but the coolest part was seeing my cousin, Chrissy. We use to talk to each other all the time, but our schedules usually have us going in different directions making any time together rare. I still like talking with her and appreciate the time we do have. If I ever leave this place, I would still return to see her and my newphew, Nathan. Anyways, I was happy to hang out with my cousin and exchange updates about our lives.

Another person I talked with recently was my best friend, Kel...the BFOE. As we moved from subject to subject like we usually do, logistics of our friendship stopped me in mine. I told her we needed to live in the same town at some point since this 1100 mile distance really sucked. She agreed. Somehow, we need to find a way to make this happen.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

I Can't Believe

2005-10-13T01:13:00.000-04:00

I am a Cleveland Browns fan. I have been for some time. I remember being little and buying Brian Sipe's glass at Wendy's. I also remember that crushed feeling I had when my grandma broke it. I still say Brian Sipe is my favorite player of all time. How could anybody forget the Kardiac Kids? Not me....and I was young back then.

Last December, I drove the kids 1100 miles to attend the last home game in Cleveland. It was their first NFL game and it was in a blizzard. My kids fell in love with the game and the team that day. All that time they thought I was crazy when I yelled at the TV screen. Yeah, that changed after sitting in the Dawg Pound. They say Mom is not crazy no more, just dedicated. Hopefully this year, we will make another game. It will either be in Cleveland in December or Minnesota in November.

Anyways, I found this at Anonymous Midwest Girl's blog:

Phrase: Cleveland Brown
Context in Which Phrase Was Heard: "She's kind of cute." "No, man, she's a Cleveland Brown."
Meaning as Described to Me: Cool uniform, f-ed up helmet.

Have a great one....

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Pictures of Me

2005-10-12T19:05:00.000-04:00

I got this from Mon's blog:

Directions:

Go to Google and click on the images link.
Type in the following and post the first (or your favorite) picture the search engine finds:

1. The name of the town where you grew up
2. The name of the town where you live now
3. Your name
4. Your Grandmother’s name
5. Your favorite food
6. Your favorite drink
7. Your favorite song
8. Your favorite smell

Here are mine:

My Hometime:

My Current City of Residence:

My Google Namesake:

My Grandma's Google Namesake:

My Favorite Food:

My Favorite Drink straight from TGIFriday's:

My Favorite Song:

I love This Smell:

Now, it's your turn.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

The In Box is Full

2005-10-12T04:24:00.000-04:00

I have 21 minutes to write this. Why 21 minutes you say? I am trying to schedule some of my "must do's" into a 3 hour block. I have realized that my "To Do" list is too long and overwhelming. I almost have no clue as to how to get so many things done in such a short time frame. I said almost.

The next couple weeks of my life are going to be jammed with so many things and so much work. Although I can set priorities, most things on my list are tagged urgent. Although my first
deadline is in 3 hours, my first major one is friday. I am really going to have to push myself to meet that one.....just so many things to do.

I use to wonder why people went on vacation when I was little. Most of the vacations we took were to visit relatives. My family once went to Tampa to visit my auntie and then we headed to Disney World. It was so fun even if we stayed at Motel 6 and ate at the Waffle House.

I really haven't had a vacation in a long time. I have gone back to Ohio about twice a year lately. That mostly consisted of visiting family and working on my mom's house. It took me two weeks to fully recover from the last trip so no matter if I should, I can't count that in my vacation tally.

I did manage to go to Albuquerque, New Mexico in April. I attended a conference, but then I stayed a few extra days to explore the area. I enjoyed the quiet time alone and the trip to Santa Fe. I was amazed what those two days did for me. I felt so peaceful. I think it should be vacation time again real soon.

I can hear my mom calling me now...."Are you coming home for Christmas?" I actually think I will have to even if I don't want to. I would love to just take some days and be quiet again. No bills, no kids, no stress, just peace and quiet. Or maybe I just need my best friend to come visit me again. Maybe laughter recharges the old battery too. Either....or, I don't care right now. Planning that is farther down on the "To Do" list. Right now, I have to get back to work and get through the next few hours....then the next couple of weeks. Maybe by Thanksgiving, I'll know what I want to do.

Uh-oh.....my alarm is ringing....21 minutes are up. Bye!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Funny Scarecrow

2005-10-11T01:30:00.000-04:00

A Care Bear Self Test

2005-10-10T03:48:00.000-04:00

I found a new test. It poses the question..."Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?" It definitely includes bears I never heard of growing up.

My results are in........

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

QOTD 2

2005-10-09T15:59:00.000-04:00

?Question of the Day?

One morning, you wake up to find a strange looking wand-like-thing in your bed. You pick it up, and are automatically transformed into a superhero! However, you are one of the most unlikely superheroes imaginable.

What is your unlikely superhero name and power?

I am Magnetiss.....able to attract any man with a mental inbalance within a 50 mile radius!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Jack Frost is Mean!

2005-10-09T14:33:00.000-04:00

I like to garden. I remember liking it when I was young. I would try to grow strawberries in the back yard. I didn't really have a clue as to what I was actually doing. I just read the directions and tried to do what I thought they said. With all the warning signs that come on things nowadays, the strawberry seed packet came with none. I had no clue that there would be several "issues" that would arise in my strawberry endeavor. Maybe an experienced gardner would be in the know, but for a 9 year old, I was left relying on the directions of the seed packet.

Pesticide was never mentioned. I don't think I really knew what pesticide was then. I knew of bug spray for the creepers that got into the house and I knew you had to wash bug spray off the fruit from the store. I never knew that I might need it in my little backyard garden. I did....really bad.

Ants are not my friends. I found out that they love strawberries. They especially liked strawberries that grow in my little garden. I also learned that if you kill an ant, several of his friends will come and retrieve the body and explore what their friend had found. Soon, one ant turn into several hundred ants. My twelve little plants were overwhelmed. In one night, all the fruit, which were still white, were attacked and mutilated. I didn't know what to do. After spending several days fighting a losing battle, I let Mother Nature have the garden.

The next year, I tried again. I loved strawberries so much that I felt they were worth the effort. I planted and then waited. Once again, the ants came. And once again, I tried to deflect them. I came up with new ideas, but still to no avail. Finally, I was about to give up. I went outside to dig up my plants. Sorry, if I can't have them, neither will the ants. Surprisingly, it had rained that morning and the plants were clear of any invaders. I inspected my green friends and found three strawberries starting to turn red. They had no damage from the creepers and were looking to be my pride and joy. I had my hope restored.

The next day, I went outside early. I wanted to inspect my berries. I was counting down to picking time and feeling so excited. I remember bending over in the garden and moving back the leaf to see the fruit. There it was. A big luscious strawberry shining bright ripened red. I smiled as I reached for it. Then I stopped. It couldn't be, but it was. There was an ant on my strawberry. I flicked the creeper off and picked the berry anyways. It only got worse. On the other side of the berry was a hole with three ants in it. Yuck! That was it. I tossed the strawberry down and let Mother Nature know the garden was her's now. I walked in the house and asked my mom to buy me some strawberries. Later that night, I enjoyed strawberry shortcake with strawberries fresh from wherever. I didn't care at that point as long as they were clean and tasty.

I quit gardening after that. Maybe if I had a clue about pesticides, I would have hung in there longer. But in the end, I found out that if you are getting no joy from it, maybe you shouldn't do it.

I started gardening a few years ago. I do it in my windows since apartment living does not afford me the outside yard space. I've usually had a good batch of veggies grow in my windows. Strawberries never make it, but the other guys usually get big and give alot of yummies off. One year, I had to make the trek back to Ohio and took my garden with me in the car. They actually made the ride and I ended up leaving them at my mom's for her enjoyment.

This year I started late. I spent so much time in Ohio, that I couldn't plant til late in the season. I thought that would be ok since the plants are indoor and sheltered from most things, especially ants. I was wrong.

Jack Frost is Mean! I mean it too. He is just a sneaky sourpuss. He maybe an elf with lots of creativity. And, I like Legolas and other elves a whole bunch. But, Jack is on the @#$% List this year. My beautiful garden was doing so good. It was thriving and healthy. I had many veggies sprouting numerous flowers. Even my children were excited about them. Then, one night not long ago, Mr. Frost decided to sneak into town. I knew frost was coming, but was told it was a few days away. Yeah, right! In my own foolish thinking, I left the window open for fresh air. That night he crept in and blanketed my green babies. When I awoke in the morning, I felt the coldness in my house. I went to the windows and suddenly my heart sank. They were dead. I spent several days trying to revive them, but it was a total loss. Everything is shriveled and dead.

Although I am sad about the loss Jack Frost caused, I do not feel defeated like I did so long ago. I am actually looking forward to next year and all of the beautiful green babies I will grow again. I know the peace I find in gardening will return as it did this year and bring me calm and happiness again. For now, I am on a break..........just like Ross said.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Dynamite Tots

2005-09-29T07:34:00.000-04:00

My friend, Duane, told me about the movie Napoleon Dynamite. He said he watched it with his nephews and they all loved it. They even quoted the movie from time to time. He told me that I had to watch it to appreciate the phrases they were saying. Although I had seen the movie at Blockbuster for weeks, I never felt interested in watching it. I even went as far as renting it for my kids, but two days later it went back to the store unwatched by any of us. When Duane said again I needed to watch it, I trusted him and went out and rented it. The kids even joined me in the viewing.

I must say I was pleasantly surprised. I laughed alot. It made such an impression that the kids and I started quoting the movie, too. My son now wears a shirt that says "Give me some of your tots!" We laugh about it over and over. Thanks Duane.

Anyways, I was online reading from one of the various blogs I go to and came across this Napoleon Dynamite test. After answering a few questions, it tells you what character from the movie you are most like. Here's my results and a link to the test:

You are Kip Dynamite and you love technology.

Which Napoleon Dynamite character are you?

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

QOTD 1

2005-09-29T02:42:00.000-04:00

?Question of the Day?

You are a piece of candy in the imaginary land of the Smurfs. You have a mission to rescue the Smurf village from the evil Gargamel. What piece of candy would you choose to be in order to complete your mission as effectively as possible?

Gum. It is amazing the uses you can create with gum, especially in tight situations. Brainy Smurf or Papa Smurf would think of something, I'm sure.

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.

Tag! You're It!

2005-09-29T01:35:00.000-04:00

I got "tagged" today. So, here you go....

10 years ago:

I was caring for a 3 year old and a 1 year old on my own.
I was separated from my husband who was in Korea.
I started going to a community college in pusuit of a R.N. degree.
I was a volunteer for Head Start and the local homeless shelter.
I still had both of my grandparents living!
I met my best friend this year.

5 years ago:

I was now living in Minnesota.
I was raising a 8 year old and a 6 year old still on my own.
I was attending a local university pursuing my undergraduate degrees in community health and Indian studies.
I considered pursuing my masters degree.
I juggled 3 jobs.
Both of my grandparents, 1 aunt, and 1 uncle were dead.
I was divorced and happy about it.

1 year ago:

I was raising a 12 year old and a 10 year old still by myself.
I was in graduate school working on my masters.
I was working for Early Head Start, but preparing to quit.
I was learning about health issues in my family.
I finally started seriously dating.
I was learning to appreciate what a thirtysomething is.

Yesterday:

I snuggled with my 13 year old and 11 year old on the couch while watching TV.
I bought several new fish that never saw morning.
I took the kids to Great Wall Chinese Buffet for dinner. Yum!
I began decorating my hallway.
I watched Martha on TV alone and then later watched Inuyasha with the 11 year old.
I talked to my friend John and we discussed the future and people we would like in it.
Chatted online with Shannon after adding to my blog.

5 songs I know all the words to:

I Need Love by LL Cool J
Me and Little Andy by Dolly Parton
My Immortal by Evanescence
How You Remind Me by Nickelback
Ultimate You by Lindsay Lohan

5 things I'd do with a million dollars

Pay off all debt
Follow my manifest list
Start my foundation
Take a vacation
Donate

5 places I'd run away to:

Walt Disney World
New Zealand
Hawaii
Italy
Chicago (The Oprah Show)

5 things I'd never wear:

"Too high" high heels
Wool bell-bottoms
Anything too tight
Anything too see-through
Football regalia from any other team than my adored Cleveland Browns

5 favorite toys:

My electronic gadgets
My games (board and video)
My books
My treadmill
My fish

5 favorite books or TV shows:

Oprah
Martha
Dog the Bounty Hunter
A Concise Dictionary of Minnesota Ojibwe by John Nichols and Earl Nyholm
Love You Forever by Robert N. Munsch and Sheila McGraw

5 Greatest joys...

Family
Friends
Faith
Love
and Roller Coasters

5 people I tag for this:

Since all people are created equal.....if you see this, consider yourself tagged!

Stay sweet 'n smile.....................Mz.